The 5 Habits of Hope | Stories and Strategies to Help You Find Your Way With Dr. Julia Garcia

Audio Transcription

Transcribed with Cockatoo

(Speaker 15)
You could be anywhere doing a lot of different things, but you chose to be here.

(Speaker 4)
Some shows don’t need a celebrity narrator to introduce the show, but this show does. In a world filled with endless opportunities, why would two men who have built 13 multi -million dollar businesses altruistically invest five hours per day to teach you the best practice business systems and moves that you can use? Because they believe in you, and they have a lot of time on their hands. This started from the bottom, Now they’re here. It’s the Thrive Time Show, starring the former U . S.

(Speaker 4)
Small Business Administration’s Entrepreneur of the Year, Clay Clark, and the entrepreneur trapped inside an optometrist’s body, Dr. Robert Zillner.

(Speaker 2)
Two men, eight kids, co -created by two different women, 13 multimillion dollar businesses. Regardless of where you fall in the political spectrum, we’re seeing a lot happening where it could cause people to lose hope. I know a lot of people say, wow the economy, there’s a lot going on with the economy. Some people are excited about who’s president, some people are not. Some people are excited about all the changes that are happening, some people are not. Some people are concerned about cryptocurrency, some people are excited about cryptocurrency.

(Speaker 2)
There’s a lot of change going on and it is possible to lose hope. But today’s guest, she is somebody who believes that everybody out there can learn something from her and implement this strategy to fill your life with hope and joy. And so much more. Her name is Dr. Julia Garcia. She’s a psychologist.

(Speaker 2)
She’s a speaker. She’s an author. She’s sort of a big deal. And she’s lowered her standards by agreeing to be on my show. Dr. Julia Garcia, welcome onto The Thrive Time Show. How are you?

(Speaker 1)
I am ready to go. I’m already having fun just with that intro.

(Speaker 2)
So first off, people know you as Dr. J. When did you decide you wanted to become a doctor?

(Speaker 1)
I actually would have never, ever imagined that in association with me, because I’m not a one -time dropout or a two -time dropout. I’m a three -time dropout. And I was suspended in undergrad. So it is a miracle that this ever happened for me. But I think the biggest thing was I really wanted to be one of the first people, the first women in my family to be able to achieve something like that. That was really important to me.

(Speaker 1)
And also, I really wanted to For that, I did everything I could to be as prepared as I could for the places I was in.

(Speaker 2)
Now, I got to ask you this about the whole psychologist title. I think people get confused. There’s a psychologist, there’s a psychiatrist, there’s a… What is a psychologist?

(Speaker 1)
As psychologists, we are, I mean, the biggest difference between psychologist and psychiatrist is we don’t prescribe medication. So that’s not what you’re going to get with us. We are mental health professionals, and we specialize in the study of the mind and behavior, and mental, emotional, and behavior, and psychiatrists are the ones you are going to go for your meds if something, if you need that.

(Speaker 2)
Now you and you have a book behind you and we’ll talk about your book in a second But I’ve got one more kind of question. I want to get your thoughts on now Nielsen is reporting that the average American is spending 11 .3 hours per day right now consuming media of some kind. 11 .3 hours per day. I don’t know how that’s possible. I think the average person might work at a job for eight hours a day, but people are consuming media.

(Speaker 2)
There’s a lot of scrolling going on. There’s a lot of sharing of things. There’s a lot of, oh, you need to watch this video right now. There’s a lot of that going on. Are you finding that that world of massive consumption of media is impacting what you do at all? Are you seeing that as a trend or not so much?

(Speaker 1)
Oh my goodness, yes. So I’ve been working in the demographics I’ve been working in for almost two decades. So what I’ve seen is up close and personal different age groups and how they’ve evolved in time. And so what I’m seeing and actually what I survey hundreds of thousands of people about is things like this. This is actually in part one of my book is context to why we need more hope in the world. And this media consumption is a huge part of it because what I’ve realized and discovered is not only are we spending time online, social media, gaming, things like that, consuming content at a rapid rate and we’re not contributing and actually creating the culture.

(Speaker 1)
And that is creating this social shift where we’re becoming the lonely generation, where we’re constantly engaged, you know, but we’re actually feeling disconnected.

(Speaker 2)
That is mind -boggling.

(Speaker 1)
So we’re consuming, not contributing.

(Speaker 2)
That’s mind boggling. Now, you work with schools. You work with other organizations. You have for quite some time. When did you decide that, hey, I’m going to write this book? When did it occur to you, hey, you know what?

(Speaker 2)
I’m seeing patterns. I’m seeing some problems that maybe you believe you can solve or you should address. When did you first get the idea to write this new book?

(Speaker 1)
Yeah, well, I wasn’t actually planning on writing about a book about hope at all. But what happened is when I work with audiences, no matter their age or gender, or background or what the career type is, or if I’m in a school system, what I was seeing on a regular basis, I was actually being inundated with the word, I’m feeling hopeless, or I struggled with hopelessness, or they would say they were struggling with something like pressure. And then they would identify the feeling as hopelessness. Seeing this hopelessness just popping up everywhere, North Dakota, New York, California, everywhere. And then I started to think, well, if there’s a way to hopelessness, there’s got to be a way to hope.

(Speaker 1)
And that’s what got the wheels turning. And then I decided to have a baby at the same time as birthing this book. And so I thought it would be really fun to do the impossible and do both at once.

(Speaker 2)
Now, you have, while giving birth to a book and a business and a baby, and think about this, folks, this woman is giving birth to a business, to a book, to a baby, a lot going on there. You somehow found time to make kind of a framework that you believe everybody could benefit from. And I’ve got notes here. You’ve got this reflect, risk, release, receive, repurpose. Walk us through this framework that you believe can help leaders, employers, and anybody out there to maybe infuse a little bit of hope in the workplace.

(Speaker 14)
Yes.

(Speaker 1)
Can you do it with me, like in real time?

(Speaker 12)
Can we do it together?

(Speaker 2)
I’m down. I’m down.

(Speaker 11)
Here we go.

(Speaker 1)
Okay, so the first I apply every single habit of hope comes with a feeling framework prompt to help you apply it real quick in real time. So that’s what we’re going to do here right now. So what you’re going to do is you’re just going to think of something that maybe you’ve struggled with in business with this podcast, anything that you haven’t really opened up about, you got it locked in could be something you struggled with a long time ago, already dealt with and handled or something you’ve struggled with more recently.

(Speaker 13)
Okay.

(Speaker 8)
You got it.

(Speaker 11)
Yep.

(Speaker 12)
Okay.

(Speaker 1)
So you’re going to complete this prompt. If you’re listening, you can jot it down or you can just think in your mind. I was struggling because fill in the blank. I’m going to read one. OK, I’ll read one to set the example. So I when I go and work in audiences, we do these exercises in real time.

(Speaker 1)
And so they write anonymously. So this is in their handwriting. I’m going to read what somebody wrote. I just picked up a random one. I have like hundreds of thousands of these. This person says, I was struggling with pressure to keep up with everything.

(Speaker 1)
Feeling fear and insecurity, anxious and shaky.

(Speaker 11)
Got it.

(Speaker 2)
So that’s kind of step one is you need to. Okay. So there’s this framework we reflect, we risk, we release.

(Speaker 10)
So yeah.

(Speaker 1)
Can you share what you struggled with?

(Speaker 2)
I would just say any time that I something doesn’t, I don’t like it, I just move on to something else.

(Speaker 1)
This is something where we are able to name and identify the feelings we’ve been trying to avoid, right? And that takes an emotional risk. And that could be what unlocks our innovation and how we develop what we want to do as a leader, because there’s all kinds of leaders in the world. But are we a courageous leader? Are we a kind leader? Or are we a jerk of a leader?

(Speaker 1)
Are we an unkind leader? So if we’re all leaders, what kind of leader are we going to be? And when we take this emotional risk, we get to really reevaluate pause, we reflected to think of where we’ve been and risk is like, let’s take a risk on maybe who we want to come become. So maybe it’s a risk in a relationship, maybe it’s a risk in a business deal, an idea and innovation. And if you’re a founder, you know that there’s a risk in everything you do. But We have to take risks in order to continue to push what’s possible, to create what isn’t already there.

(Speaker 1)
And this person, when they identified the feeling framework, which is, I felt, this person said, I felt hopeless. This person said, I felt insecure. And another person said, I felt fear. Fear is one of the biggest drivers that holds us back in any professional or creative pursuit. And that is something I hear all the time.

(Speaker 2)
You know, and I think this is one thing that’s unique about our podcast. It’s kind of unique is, you know, there’s somebody listening to this show right now who’s like, This is what I needed to hear. And I know there’s somebody out there listening to this. And I can just tell you this particular individual I’m thinking about, they came to me and they said, hey, you know, this guy broke up with me. They didn’t come to me. They were just acting in the workplace, very lethargic and off their game.

(Speaker 2)
And so what I do, Dr. Julia, is I say, why don’t you go talk to this person? And then I move on. So I don’t really I don’t know that I have, but this book might be helpful for people like that because it was definitely impacting their work performance because they were upset about something that happened and it turns out it was a boyfriend that had gone awry.

(Speaker 1)
Yeah, I think it’s also not just about, I like to think about anything helpful in our healing and health and well -being as preventative. I like to say it’s oil in your car. So I used to drive the Toyota Corolla back in the day. The window didn’t wind up, the sound, the volume didn’t turn. I had busted a window once on a night I will not tell you about. It is not PG and it was just, it was a busted up car and I’d always have to pull over and put oil in the car.

(Speaker 1)
because there was a leak. And what I realized is that’s what this work is about. This self work that we do so that we can show up and not just be successful, but sustain it and have healthy relationships with the people closest to us and ourselves is we keep doing the preventative work because you may not be struggling today, but in two weeks you might hit something where you’re like, oh shoot, I got to deal with this head on. I don’t want to deal with it. I don’t got time to deal with it. All these things.

(Speaker 1)
And now you have an internal toolkit. Now you’ve got some oil you could put in your car so that you don’t have a breakdown. or burnout or meltdown.

(Speaker 2)
Now, so you have this framework is you have reflect, risk, release, receive, repurpose. So reflect, okay, got that. Risk, got that. Release. What is release?

(Speaker 9)
What does it mean?

(Speaker 1)
Release is one of the biggest things because when you do, do, do, do, do so much it compiles and sometimes these piles become so overwhelming you can’t even see straight. So release is finding a way to let go of control, perfectionism, maybe having to pivot. creating space so that you can do that. But release comes in the form of whatever works for you in that time. So there was a time where I didn’t talk. I did not talk about feelings.

(Speaker 1)
I did not talk about struggles, whether it was in business or personal or relational, I wasn’t gonna talk about it. So I would write about it. I used to run about it before I messed up both of my knees playing sports. And it really just depends, but you have to find what works for you. And if you do not create a space to release, our bodies can only hold so much. So we might think that we are these like immune human beings can just take on the world, and that’s great, but that’s false hope.

(Speaker 1)
That’s not realistic. So what we want to do is create an emotional pattern, a habit, to break up that, I can do this all. I’m going to do this all. I’m very independent.

(Speaker 7)
I got it all.

(Speaker 1)
I don’t need help from anybody. I’m a superhuman being, and create a moment to release in a consistent way that works for you and your life, your lifestyle, so that you don’t get a buildup, and again, it leads to a burnout. or a breakdown, because what we want to do is create not just life goals, but a lifestyle that’s sustainable and healthy for not just us, but the people we love. So forcing ourselves to pause, check in, and create these systems and these patterns so that we can have a sustainable career. relationship and a self -view that’s healthy.

(Speaker 2)
Now, this next phase is receive. What does receive mean?

(Speaker 1)
So receiving is one of the trickiest things to do when you are super high performing or independent. You don’t ask for help. You don’t need no help from anybody. And what this is, is it’s receiving support, if that’s what you need, collaboration, mentorship. It’s this, I got attitude. I don’t need anyone.

(Speaker 1)
So you become this thought pattern creates a cycle where you stay in this cycle of not opening up to the point where you’ll receive support from others. And if you don’t do that, you cannot collaborate, you cannot innovate alongside of each other, you cannot receive, whether it’s, it could be love, it could be advice, it could be insight, wisdom, whatever that is, if we are closed off, because we’ve got this, then we are not open to receive. So hopeful leaders, they will stay open, whether it’s to feedback, support, mentorship, And that way, it allows us the opportunity to collaborate and propel growth.

(Speaker 2)
And when you work with schools or other organizations, what are the most common issues that people on planet Earth right now, 2025, you’re finding that they are dealing with the most? What are the most common issues where people say, I feel helpless because, or this is my area that I’m struggling with? What are you seeing as the common pattern?

(Speaker 1)
I think the two is loneliness, as we talked about earlier. People are very hyper -connected. We live in the most hyper -connected era of all time, but we’re feeling the loneliest. And the other is this feeling of not being good enough. And constantly, I see and I work alongside people who give everything. I mean everything.

(Speaker 1)
With the biggest hearts, the hardest hustle, just the biggest selfless people who are trying to make their communities better, their relationships better, themselves better, and they just don’t feel like no matter what they do, that they’re enough. Or no matter how much they do or achieve, the success they achieve, there’s just always, they need to get more, more, more, more. There’s just never enough. And that feeling of not being enough is driving this wheel that’s just spinning and spinning and spinning. And eventually, it falls apart.

(Speaker 2)
And when you work with, just for the listeners out there, because you’ve got a very deep background in doing this, can you maybe share some of the industries that you’ve helped out with as well, in addition to schools? I mean, for anybody out there that’s like, I’m a teacher, I’m a doctor, I’m a lawyer, I’m a home builder. What are all the other kinds of organizations that you’ve worked with?

(Speaker 1)
Yeah, I’ve worked with detention officers. I’ve worked in prisons. I’ve worked with organizations from Salesforce to Toyota. I’ve helped build a crisis intervention line. I built it from the ground up and ran that during the height of the pandemic. I’ve worked with alongside tech teams to develop different things like social media for young women.

(Speaker 1)
I have worked with communities, mental health professionals, But I, yeah, the span has been, and that’s another thing when I looked at my background and the work that I get called in to do, it’s been very eye -opening because I’m always like, me, you want me to come and bring, but hope is something that every single person in industry, if you don’t have hope, you know how destructive that can be for your relationship, for yourself, for your business, for your family dynamics. When you don’t have hope, it can be so catastrophic.

(Speaker 2)
Do you find that hopelessness is a major issue in the world today? I mean, is this a very, very common thing?

(Speaker 8)
Yes.

(Speaker 1)
I think it is a big enough issue to write a book about it.

(Speaker 2)
OK, well, I’m just curious, because I think there are some people like we interviewed Daniel Goleman years ago, and he wrote this book called Emotional Intelligence. And he believes that a lot of people really struggle with that. And I think this book, The Five Habits of Hope, may really connect with somebody out there. You have reflect, risk, release, receive, and repurpose. That’s the framework. So reflect, risk, release.

(Speaker 2)
release, receive, and repurpose. What does repurpose mean?

(Speaker 1)
Oh, I love to think about repurpose. So my mom, I’m one of six kids and she, we never really had, um, a ton of things, but she always showed up for us in so many ways. But with all these six kids, I didn’t even have my own room for most of my childhood, but she had this room that we called her pretty’s room where she would garage sales and estate sales. And she would take things like old furniture and she would reclaim them. She would basically take what was thrown out or what people saw was a waste and she would see something in it and she would repurpose it and it would have a home in our home. And repurposing is very similar to that.

(Speaker 1)
It’s taking like say anger, for example, and saying, okay, if my feelings are neutral, how can I take the anger I felt personally? And I’ll just share a really intimate example. I lost someone at a really young age to a drug overdose and that anger that I felt, that It almost took me out for many years, which is another story. But eventually, I learned the emotional habit of repurposing. So I took that anger, and I repurposed it. And it led me to develop prevention programming for universities and colleges around the country, which started to propel my career at a really young age and at a different time.

(Speaker 1)
But that anger was then repurposed. And so what we could do, even as an entrepreneur myself, I have failed so many times. But I take that failure and I repurpose it and it’s fuel. to create something new to continue to keep going and to innovate under pressure and to pivot. And so repurposing is one of the most powerful things I think we can do professionally and creatively because it takes things that people throw or disregard or think was a waste of time or was quote unquote failure. And it rewrites the story, it flips the script and it gives us a new trajectory of what’s possible moving forward.

(Speaker 2)
Now, in your book, my understanding is you do talk about these thing called the hope blocks, which you mentioned earlier a little bit, but hope blocks, where there are things that you see as a common pattern. Walk us through these hope blocks. What do you see in organizations and with business folks as relates to hope blocks?

(Speaker 1)
Yeah, I think one of the biggest things, I’ll give a real example of someone I was working with, and I was working with an entire school community. So everyone from cafeteria aides to principals, teachers, guidance counselors, every single person on that campus that worked. It was the entire district community came. We did a full day of workshops. And at the end of the workshop, I had the principal come up on stage with me, who I had gotten to know really well. We had spent a lot of time together with their team.

(Speaker 1)
And I said, OK. in front of all your, your staff and your team, what is one way they can support you moving forward? And they stumbled and it wasn’t because they were shy. They were just stumbling because they couldn’t think of anything. And they said, I don’t know. I can’t think of anything. And I said, I just paused.

(Speaker 1)
And I said, okay, let’s just, let’s just sit in this awkward moment for a minute, because that’s one thing we don’t do often enough. Let’s just, let’s all be awkward together. Peers again, peers of peers, let’s do it. And so we’re sitting there awkward. I’m like, I’ll wait. You got, you got to come up with something.

(Speaker 1)
I’m going to wait. It’s your time now. And eventually they said something, but what we got to the heart of was that even after an entire day of workshops of watching breakthrough with their team and coming alongside them and having these innovative ideas and this fresh sense of what’s possible, they still realized that they felt everything was on them. They weren’t building the teamwork that they were trying to create a culture of. They weren’t setting the example from the top.

(Speaker 1)
Culture at the bottom starts at the top. We know this, but if we don’t lead that we want people to follow, Everyone wants to be a leader. Everyone wants the follows. But are you the kind of leader that people should be following? And it’s making sure we do it first. And that goes as far as I think that’s the biggest thing with burnout and things like that.

(Speaker 1)
The teamwork, the collaboration, the hearing people out and creating space to actually share innovative ideas, but also listen to others. There’s so many things I could spin off on that. But I think it really at the heart of it is that we think it’s all on us.

(Speaker 2)
Now, I’m going to pull this up here. I’m going to pull up your book here for people that want to check out the book here. We got the yellow cover going on. Great cover, by the way. The Five Habits of Hope. Again, yellow cover, folks.

(Speaker 2)
You can’t miss it. The Five Habits of Hope. I’ve got three final questions for you. If somebody is on the fence about buying your book, maybe what would be the reason why someone should buy your book as opposed to buying a regrettable burrito at a local convenience store? Why should everybody pick up a copy of your book?

(Speaker 1)
Well, I’m a burrito lover, so this is a really tricky question. There’s no better happy place than me with a burrito on a couch, okay? That is low -key my secret. But I would say if you don’t want to buy it, gift it. Gift hope to somebody else. If you don’t want it for yourself, gift it to somebody else.

(Speaker 1)
And we in a season of gifting, okay? So grab that book for somebody else, tie a little bow around it, hope.

(Speaker 2)
Question number two. for people out there that don’t know a lot about you and they’re gonna look you up, what’s one kind of interesting fact that you believe everyone might want to know about you that they don’t know or that wouldn’t know by default that everyone out there should know?

(Speaker 1)
There’s a lot. I do share a lot vulnerably out there, but I think I want people to know that I have failed a lot. I want people to know I’m a three -time dropout. I want people to know I was a single mom. I’m an minority woman business owner. I want people to know that it has been a scrappy, beautiful journey.

(Speaker 1)
And I want people to know that I am a real person. I’m not perfect, but I am passionate. So if there’s anything you ever know about me, you’re going to know I am passionate. So with all the mess, I hope that’s who you discover in me.

(Speaker 2)
Final question for you, for anybody out there that’s eagerly taking notes or going, okay, I like this Julia Clay. I like Julia more than you. In fact, I’ve done my research and I like her. What is the call to action you would have for anybody out there that’s saying, hey, I’m kind of, what you’re saying resonates with me. What is the call to action you’d have for all of our listeners out there today?

(Speaker 1)
I’m taking a moment because I want it to be, I don’t want to just regurgitate things I’ve said before. I really want it to drop in, but I am hoping that if you’re listening, that you take some sort of action and invest in your worth and your relationships. And I’m hopeful that you don’t lose hope. And don’t think that you have to have a ton of it. You can have a little bit of hope to try that business idea, to go talk to that person, to forgive yourself. You don’t need a ton of hope, just a little bit right now.

(Speaker 1)
Take action and be bold.

(Speaker 2)
As a man who’s read a lot of books, I will tell you, your book cover is one of the best covers I’ve ever seen. This book is a great book. They’re The Five Habits of Hope. I mean that it’s a great cover for anybody who listens to my show for any amount of frequency. You know that I’ve not told anybody on my show before. That’s the best looking cover I’ve seen.

(Speaker 2)
But that really is a great looking cover. Thank you for hopping on the show today. I really do appreciate you. And I encourage everyone to check out the book, The Five Habits of Hope. Thank you, Dr. J. I hope you have a great rest of your day.

(Speaker 1)
Thank you so much for having me.

(Speaker 7)
Take care.

(Speaker 5)
Bye bye.

(Speaker 3)
But Clay Clark, man, he is one character.

(Speaker 5)
It’s a good word for character. Yeah, that is it.

(Speaker 3)
Good, driven, smart. And I’ve never met a guy who was so hyper all the time. He’s doing so much good. And then I met his mother and she just says she just lets him be Clay Clark. I mean, so he’s endorsed by his mother. And he’s doing magnificent work.

(Speaker 3)
So it was great meeting you out there and all the people that he surrounds himself with. His clay Clark starts his days at five o ‘clock in the morning.

(Speaker 5)
Oh, it’s incredible. Yeah, he’s he’s like, he’s he’s a machine. He’s a machine.

(Speaker 3)
But his you know, I could I have problems with my company starting at nine o ‘clock. Yes. Hundreds of people showing up at 5am in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Man, he’s a leader of a leader. He’s fantastic.

(Speaker 6)
Yeah, man. No, he is.

Transcribed with Cockatoo