Dealing With Stress And Overcoming Adversity – Ask Clay Anything
Audio Transcription
In this special podcast only version of the Thrivetime Show business coach Clay Clark will give you a 5 step action plan to solve your adversity and stress problems.
How to deal with stress and how to overcome adversity?
Step 1 – Write down the worst case scenario
Step 2 – Embrace that the worst thing is going to happen
Step 3 – Believe and embrace that God has a plan and if you do your best then you can forget the rest
NOTABLE QUOTABLE – Lazy hands make for poverty, but diligent hands bring wealth. – Proverbs 10:4
AMPLE EXAMPLE of a Hard Working Woman – Lori Montag – https://www.slapwatch.com/
Step 4 – Break down your big goal into the small action steps
Step 5 – Block out time to do what matters (Take Action)
Another as special exclusive podcast edition of the thrive time show. People are just beginning to discover I’m getting worried, because people are starting to discover in droves that if they owe us to info at thrive time should i, will actually answer it right here on the podcast edition of the thrive time show, right here where we have our business conferences because we only have you a two hour format:them have to kind of stick with him, but on the podcast we truck, we have an infinite amount of time. We can stay here for 37 hours in a row if we wanted to or until I need to go, have breakfast with my cat’s. Okay that’ll, be here a little while if we want to doso here it isn’t, he has much time as you want, and the next 14 minutes. Okay, so here is how to deal with stress and how do you overcome adversity? Alright, so let’s go ahead and break it down. Cuz I break down the steps, if you can put them on the show notes, I want to make sure they were going to break it down together. I’ll. Do it step number one right down the worst case scenario you just whatever you’re stressed out about i, don’t know what it is. Maybe it’s you’re worried about me know getting the wrong house hypothetically. Maybe you have to buy a house in like 5 days, because if you don’t you can’t possibly close before your wedding dresses, anybody on the other side of that camera or the microphone couldn’t could be related to. Perhaps you are really really worried about a relationship issue. You know perhaps you’re worried, about yes, perhaps you’re worried about your mother-in-law visiting, perhaps you’re worried about anything so step. One though you write down the worst case scenario whatever it is that you fear the most just go ahead and write it down then step 2 I mean this. This is my second step in brace that the worst possible thing is going to happen. Just say to yourself. This really really terrible Thing:i’m not going to find a house in the next 5 days and then just discovered I need to buy a house but I’m going to get married hypothetically and you know 30 days or so, and the house I was supposed to buy. It didn’t actually come through because of some weird you know. What’s really weird is a real estate appraisal things maybe we’re going to happen. Special bought a house inspections, don’t pass whatever I wanted to happen, but let’s just go ahead step, one right down the worst case scenario:what happens if you can’t close to embrace that is going to not happen, embrace that the worst thing is going to that you’re not going to get. The house did brace that you’re not going to get the house or not to get the job and I can get the deal you’re not going to get the the whatever it is that you want step, 3, believe and embrace that god has a plan, and if you do your best, forget the rest.
So, just embrace that if you have done the best, then you can forget the rest of you. Just do and I’m not talking about kind of your best you’re close to your master. I can my past and you didn’t do your best I’m talking about you. Do everything possible in the natural and then what god do what he wants to do the supernatural, but don’t get that mixed up, don’t feel bad if it doesn’t work and you did your best, but don’t a half-ass amount of effort into something and then hope that that god is going to help you because there’s all sorts of scripture will put on them on the shuttle. Proverbs 10:4 says that god blesses, the diligent i, see a lot of negligent people who were wanting blessings. You have to do your best, but then you just forget the rest. You say you know what so it doesn’t have its as an example of chapter break these down, but this is just example for my life I remember:i, wanted to get into the dallas bridal show it was called the hotel, dallas bridal show.Com I wanted to get in that show and I wanted to get into the tulsa wedding. Show me to get a specific 2/3. The brides were getting married, will typically go to a bridal show to find a bj, the photographer there limo that cater in all that stuff. It’s a wild, seen and so you’d show up at a hotel and it’s a line with booths in boost trade. Show each booth is 10 x, 10, there’s all sorts of pipe and drape, and skirting and and I just might attended it before wanting to get in it. But I was told I couldn’t get in it because they have another dj and you couldn’t get in, because I was already like 5 disc jockeys. Are the five photographer took a maximum amount of vendors per category? That was the real. You had a maximum number of vendors. You had like 5 perk at all, you’re allowed to have you couldn’t have 10 and so i. Remember talking to the person who put on the show the advertising I said:i want to buy a booth, and she says you can’t get back with. You will see, but you know clay. We can have more than 5 of a particular category. Just can’t do it, you can’t do it. We can’t remove nothing. You can do to like to do what I will call you back. We love to do it and I’m not bitter about. If I do remember so i, remember, saying:okay, so I can’t get it. What do I need to do? I mean how can I possibly get in she said.
Will you call the other djs in the bill again so like a blind, naive, idiot I did call the competitors. Cuz I was a up-and-coming dj with the age of 20, with the entrepreneur of the year for the city of tulsa and he’s 40 year old guys are losing market share right, so I thought he was going to talk to my buddy lori montana I got plans to go talk to lord, montague and feelings coming to montague photography, a prominent booth at the shell and I made a plan. I typed it up when I ate half by 11 sheet of paper is probably 10 step plan. Some like that, knowing myself and it what I would have done back in the day would be very detailed and I said:hey was yours, I’m, going to rent out the renaissance hotel I’m, going to rent out the renaissance, hotel and I’m going to have my own wedding show their vendors are going to be there and I said you may ask them we’re all going to have a show. She says:how are we going to pay for the show as well? It’s about 600 bucks to rent a booth at the other she’s? No, no! It’s about 800 rent, a booth at 7:25, plus all the fees 800 rent, a booth at the other show. Where can I do a business conferences show for the vendors that can’t get into that show and we’re going to do that thing for 500 bucks, a piece $20,000 and lori montag just has she built these any bands in the slap watch right in the slap slap watch was featured on the view with barbara walters. Tell me the time and she said:are you all in all I’m all in I’m, going to bring the boat baby I got to do it so I’m in so I use my discover card to discover and I paid the deposit at the renaissance hotel to rent out, not just a small ballroom I’m talking about the big kahuna dug out, like maybe 20 grand. If I can’t fill it up, then I called, I called call the meadowbrook, country club and remember lady work. There was a lady or something maybe is that your deal, no no hate for not bitter i. Just want you to know that i. Remember it. So I went to how’s it going by the way, so I decided I’d like to see me featuring future, the renaissance hotel, going to beat your lori montague and myself and other vendor. She said we’re not interested I called the golf club of oklahoma i. Just ever since I can remember.
I can remember this, so I reached out and kitty with the gulf of oklahoma kitty. She says yeah will do it. It’s a start-up show. We’ve got commitments from many people, including the renaissance hotel lorie line tag myself, but will do it for trade out and we don’t have the budget to do a startup show us a jerk, don’t call another company i. Remember all this I called call the embassy, suites and window and I’m not bitter or wella, or how many other vendors are going to be there and I said I will probably have to mean when I have it to the grand ballroom all really going to be. There I said what you have a dj connection:you have a romantic photography in the renaissance hotel I mean you’ve got to the golf club of oklahoma. Remember where we sold real booth and I kept telling telling telling and I kept making the minimum payments as we got closer to the show, then I had to buy $18,000 of ads on channel 8 ball boy I buy $18,000 of ads to promote the wedding, show so I’m buying my ads. Laura vandervoort in lauren was my advertisement and as she sold the ads to me, and then I was on that show in the morning. Just promoting that thing. I put it up telling people how big it’s going to be buying ads, cranking it up crying to be i. Just been current selling booze and I’m on the phone. Just dialed, stupid and I’m, not I’m, not exaggerating I would probably make 150 calls a day myself, just calling all the vendors, if they ever put me to voicemail, hit the zero and I’m sorry I guess I got missed, missed, transfer, misconnect waiting on hold just closing deals. So it’s like two weeks before the show we got galaxy limo we got embassy suites we got renaissance in there. We’ve got the golf club oklahoma at montague photography. We got everybody in there and I clear the prophet of about five six grand on the first show nice, but let me tell you what djs were not allowed into the broadway business conferences show those guys infinity couldn’t get through i, don’t know, exact, couldn’t get a booth. No, no. We couldn’t get a booth. Powerhouse couldn’t get a booth. The wave couldn’t get a booth, so wave bye-bye. You know which really wouldn’t really work.
Where would you rather have a bridal shower i? Would you rather have it at the old school doubletree hotel, or would you rather get the brand new renaissance, hotel and so I took a big bite and so the entire time I wrote down the worst case scenario. Worst case Scenario:i’m going to pay massive interest on my credit card, I didn’t i, didn’t I would go homeless. I would just have to have mass of interest payments on a card that I probably take me a year to pay off. Second I embrace today it’s going to happen, I’m not going to sell it out it done it. I’ve already decided mentally I’ve dealt with it. I’ve dealt with the pain mentally of not having to happen. I’ve already said it’s not going to happen, so how would I feel so my dad died? It wasn’t that dramatic for me, because I actually experienced it mentally before I do when my dad dies of a less, how I feel and I actually remember taking the significant portion of a data morning for my dad and think about what that would be like and then I moved on, but you have to embrace the worst a good three of the third you got to believe in the grace of god has a plan, and if you do your best, then you can forget that, because if his plan is for it to happen, who can come against god’s plan? Try to me if god wants it to happen? Who is strong enough to outwit god’s plan? If it’s not meant to happen, who can you know who it is meant to happen? You can stop it.
There’s things in my life where I like people said it’s not going to happen. I’m, like I just feel called to do it, and then it happens so I again that is my philosophy, that’s my system, that’s how I would do it and she would like to have you break down easily step step, one right down the worst case scenario. Have you seen that play out with the clients that you coach as a business coach where they have a horrible stressor, a big adversity, a big source of anxiety? How have you seen them in brace the worst case scenario? Well it, what is does were you, as it’s kind of a cathartic release, right, you’re, actually putting it on paper, you’re spending time thinking about what is the worst. That could happen. Cuz a lot of times, it’s just kind of a vague and ambiguous negative looming feeling right all right. Okay, so you don’t get the big job that you’re hoping you don’t get them okay, then! Well, then you’ll just have to build some more and get some other jobs. Right is right to make some more calls when you actually break it down to that tiny glass. What is going to happen there? What is going to happen right, down., worst case scenario and you think about it, you’re being more proactive and it just helps your brain and even for extreme cases of bankruptcy example. Think about this nation. How many times did walt disney lose everything? None 0? How many times did walt disney the great walt disney? How many times did he lose everything twice? What do I henry, ford v, henry ford lost it all five times. You think about this think about. Do you know that jeff beezus, your amazon, the everything store that we started the company? The company did not turn a profit for 9 years, 9 g, none 4900 east and not making a profit for 9 years. There’s a deal in order to become profitable. You know what he had to do, what he had to lay off 1300 employees. That’s a lot of people! That’s a lot of families, a lot of guilt. You know what about you on musk tesla, to make espn real fast, like elon musk, for a minute talking about this. You know. What’s it worst case scenario, the guy has built a rocket company. Yes, you see the videos online. What’s the worst-case near the rocket blows up, we watched it happen, but before he keeps going in paypal to paypal data error in the code and every time that you do the transaction, it cause them to lose money and it was scaling. That’s a system you want to skip I need, so I can I’m just saying:there’s nobody who has avoided some kind of adversity. Learn more at our business conferences.
So it’s something as serious as losing a loved one or a spouse or a or a house. Then what you have to do if you have to step one right down the worst case scenario? Okay, so we’re going to be living at the dr office. We don’t get this house. Will it at the thrive off it’s okay? Okay, where do a month-to-month apartment at the vintage on yeah, we’re going to pay a premium for one month to live in a place, all her crap going to stay in storage and we’re just buried. You don’t even need furniture just need a blanket cuz. You know you was the man on service. The bed thing is going to happen. You have to just say it’s going to have. No third now get if you don’t believe in the same religious views that I do that’s fine, but you have to believe it. It breaks. You have to do your best i. Just so many people going dear jesus, dear sweet baby, jesus i, don’t know I just prefer a baby jesus sweet baby jesus, my podcast, to be successful. I want my business to make a profit. I want to sell more mattresses. I want I want, have a better marriage. I want to get in better shape. Please help me what you got to do something else. You got to do something he had a very very best. If you missed the michael levine podcast holy crap, you need to listen to that because he wages war on the idea of the 40-hour work business conferences week. Working 6 days a week, home skillet, you better be great. If you’re not grinding you’re, going to lose that. Don’t tell me that you did your best, don’t tell yourself into the best cuz you’re. Never cognitive dissonance in your head, cuz you’re, going to know that you actually do your best and that’s a freaking problem. That is a problem and one thing:i see I love. This quote, do your best and forget the rest. A lot of people I see, have it backwards. There have an issue and they just want. They get paralyzed by the paralysis by analysis right. They just sit there and they rest and hope for the best. But, like clay just said, you have to take action and one action step. You can take that I see a lot of people that are stressed out. They think they’re not managing their time right there. If they’re reacting to everything, and so everything seems like a burning fire. So the first thing, a couple of steps you can do is get a calendar get on google calendar, to find some counter that you can use and time block out your time to actually sit down, and do these things do the things that you need to do in your business in your life is repetitive tasks, and if the thing you need to block out at the right down as worst case scenario and follow the steps then do that.
But you’ve got to take control of your time. If your time is just running around like crazy, you are going to feel like you’re on fire every day, so step for breakdown, your big goal and a small action steps of the big big thing up in this is big thing we have to do. You know the thing I had to do was I too cold call all of the vendors in tulsa to get a yes-or-no out of all of them. So I had to step one had to write a script, step 2 at block out time to call him so the final step, step 5. You want to block out time to do what matters block out time (which you can learn at our thrivetime business conferences) to do what matters to quote:lee cockrell nothing gets done, it’s not scheduled. Nothing gets done. It’s not scheduled who’s. Lee lee cockrell was the former executive vice president of walt disney world resorts, a man who used to manage 40000 + employees, and he said you got to block out time to do what matters you absolutely must block out time for what matters you to put it in the calendar. So again, the question was how to deal with stress and how to overcome adversity, step one right down the worst case scenario step to embrace. That is going to happen and brace that the worst thing is going to happen. Don’t fall asleep, believe it’s not going to happen and save yourself. What’s is it couldn’t possibly happen, even scared about it’s, probably cuz? It could happen right so it can happen. It might happen believe in god has a plan and if you do your best-and you can forget the rest and have a very specific practical level-break down-that big old elephant you’re trying to eat into small, advocating eating elephants that rip off at 2, you rip off this to the trunk rip off the whatever the whatever that is and I’ll do it. But you got a new one by the time not going to eat the whole count. One time right unless you’re a anaconda anaconda applaud you for getting on to this podcast to it’s freaking crazy. Sending email is an anaconda with no hands and fingers. That’s the idea of an anaconda makes me nauseous, so I’m, sorry for going there visually drivers. Is it going to snow in steps and less in anaconda and then step 5 block out time to do what matters and go any further due I’m kind of done
