Doctor Joe Lai’s father was born in Vietnam, and his mother was born in communist Cuba, but how did he become the success story that people know today? During today’s show, Doctor Joe Lai shares how his parents went from communism to financial freedom and how to effectively manage people.
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Link to the venue where Dr. Joe’s epic 40th birthday party went down
What type of person do you need to hire for the specific job?
Get ready to enter the business coach thrive time show on the bottom, the bottom on the top, the systems to kibble. Got Dixon’s hooks hopper down the books, sees brigit some wisdom in the book. That’s why if you see my wife and kids, please tell them. And now three, two, one. Here we go. All right, thrive nation. Welcome back to the thrive time show on your radio podcast download. Many of you are just now finding our podcast for the first time. Thank you for subscribing. Thank you for leaving us a review and if you did already subscribe and review or if you’re going to subscribe and review, if you will, to subscribe to the thrive time. Show on itunes and leave us an objective review. We will actually give you free tickets to our next in person. Thrive time show workshop. We’ve had people from Canada do this. People from Guam do this. People from Florida, people from New York, people from Mexico, from them all over the world attend our conferences just like you and they attended for Free Bible by basically just subscribing to the podcast and leaving us an objective business coach review. And if you don’t believe me, and I would encourage you not to believe me, type in thrive time, show reviews, and you can see over 600 video reviews from real people just like you who have attended our in person workshops and on our show.
What we’d like to do is we’d like to interview guests that have been there and done that. Are they perfect? No. Are they always improving? Yes. We want to interview real entrepreneurs who’ve really done it because it’s so easy to be a charlatan. Talking about the theories and talking about here’s what you should do and here’s a book you should read and here’s the 27 steps for success and here’s the eight principles of management and leadership, but what does it look like when you really start a company? What are the most difficult challenges that every entrepreneur faces? And I’ve worked with so many entrepreneurs and I can tell you 100 percent of the time when I meet, when I meet a business owner, their toughest challenge is learning to manage people. And so today’s guest, Dr Joe Lye, the orthodontist, Dr Joe Lye. Check them out at Kirkpatrick and Lye, that’s k l, Ortho.com.
Kl Ortho Dot Com. He’s going to talk to us about his journey to success, how we got started and he’s going to teach us his philosophy towards managing people because he is uniquely qualified to do that. He’s so good at identifying the different personalities and learning to manage people without his head exploding. A Dr. Joe Lye, my friend. Welcome back onto the show. How are you doing, clay? It is wonderful to be here in the man cave. Very jealous the man came in. By the way. You are partially responsible for, uh, uh, the, the soon to becoming a addition called the Lampoon Laguna, the lampoon lagoon that will be behind the camp Clark and chicken palace. I’m excited. Thank you for putting in the swing. Vote there in that and that debate. I love it. Anything I can do for you to make it happen? Yes. Now. Okay. Now. So what we’re talking about today is we’re trying to teach the listeners out there how they can start from wherever they are today and become successful. So I want to, I want to hear your story, um, how were you raised and what was life like for you growing up as a kid?
Well, I would say, um, I’m pretty average as far as I was born and raised in the 19 eighties. Uh, my father immigrated from Vietnam. Okay. And My mother is Cuban fits, I would say let’s go back because she’s 50 percent Cuban and 50 percent Chinese that my father is actually 100 percent Chinese. So I’m your mom and dad meet. That’s the magic question. I always get. Well, I was getting what, what nationality are you? So I gave you that and they met because my father, uh, was on a merchant ship and he would just sail around. Um, and somehow he had a friend on the island of Cuba. Uh, I think they would port there occasionally and that’s where the magic happened. Really? Yeah. So this friend introduced my dad to my mother and uh, just kind of took off from there. So your, your dad is from Vietnam and he met your mom in Cuba? Yes. This all makes sense. Total business coach sense, right? Did this probably relates then to how we met, can you explain to listeners how you and I met because how you and I met I think makes a lot of sense. It’s like my mom’s from Cuba, my dad’s from Vietnam. They met in Cuba. Now clay and I are buddies. How can you explain to the listeners how you and I originally met? Uh, we met,
uh, basically from my wife. So my wife is from Oklahoma City. I’m from Tulsa and we met in dental school. So, uh, you know, I talked her into coming to Tulsa. God’s country, correct? Yeah, absolutely. And so from there, obviously we decided to get married and she’s looking for a Dj for the wedding. I remember Sharon filled out the form. Yes. Sharon filled out the form and thus clay walks into our life. Uh, he rocks this with all these spectacular moves, power moves. And next thing you know, he’s deejaying our wedding, which turned out to be probably one of the top five moments in my life and experiences.
I guess I got to say something about Sharon and your wife. This is, this is probably the backstory that listeners need to know. Sharon, your mother in law and your wife are classy women. Thank you. Your wife. A very classy woman. So my wife used to drop me off and I’m not classy. I. I am a dive bar. I’m a human dive bar so my wife would drop me off at Panera bread because I couldn’t afford an office. I’m not kidding at 10:00 AM and then she would go work at at all. She was still working. I mean I had three jobs. I’m at target, applebee’s direct TV and I got to a place in my life where I was now working just one with one other job. Okay. So I’m working at faith highway now at this time in my life. I worked at faith highway like four days a week, the other three days a week and full time work in my company.
Dj Connection. We had one car so my wife would drop me off at Panera bread like 10 in the morning and I would stay there until like 9:00 PM and I would meet people and clients every hour and then when I wasn’t meeting clients I would make phone calls and so I didn’t get kicked out. I would buy a meal every 45 minutes. I’d buy something every 45 minutes I’d buy a beverage because if you’re over there, you’re there for more than 45 minutes. You don’t buy something back in the day to kick you out. And at first they were really annoyed because this guy in a suit is there and every hour there’s another customer coming in, another couple. And so I remember the manager walks up to me. She says, do you literally meet a different bride and groom every hour? I go, yeah. She goes, can you not afford an office?
And I go, no, because I didn’t. I didn’t know what an office costs. I didn’t know. I never even thought about leasing an office. I’m not kidding. I wasn’t because I couldn’t afford it. I think I just didn’t even know you could. I just thought it was an impossible number, you know, I didn’t know. And so I, I, I’m still officing at Panera bread. I would walk in and they’d, they’d hop on the Pinera mic and they would were, they would do, they would announce it for your food order was ready. I would walk in and Fareed who saying f a r e e d fareed worked who’s manager I’d walk in and free to go ladies and gentlemen, Dj, you know, and I’d walk in and then I would just buy meals for people. So I’m meeting your mom or your mother in law and your wife there and at the time your fiance and they’re classy and they’re looking at me and this is what they’re thinking. This guy is a dive bar.
Why is he meeting at Panera bread? I mean, there are all these questions that are obvious. Like, why doesn’t he have an office? Why are we at Panera bread? Why is he a dive bar? I mean, there’s all these weird. But somehow I remember looking at Sharon and Sharon says, if I remember this, I go, Sharon says if I hire you, will you do a good job? And I said, I’ll do a great job. It would be the best job ever, but there’ll be a blast blast or something like that. And she was like, okay, we’re going to hire you. And I’m like, yes. Because there’s one of my first class. He weddings. It was at the summit club. Yes. It was like the. I remember when I went to the summit club to us to set up my business coach equipment. I’m thinking to myself, I’m in the summit club.
I have these people because I had never been in a place that nice [inaudible]. It’s like a country club and the sky and there’s a. I think he was on the 31st floor and the third I think you. You got married on the 31st floor of the Bank of America Tower and the 32nd floor. There’s other stuff going on. There’s another wedding in. By the way, those people came down into the weddings. We were rocking. Yes. Can you describe, can you describe any of the moments that you remember the most from that weddings? I remember your father, your father in law hired pistol pete from the Oklahoma State Mascot, Yale folks. And he says to me, he’s a classy guy too. He says, um, here’s the deal. In just a moment, a pistol pete will be coming down. And I’m like, what’s pistol pistol peaks? I’m not from Oklahoma, you know, man, I was born here, but I didn’t really. I moved to Minnesota early on, so I’m like, who’s pistol pete? What’s going on? He’s like, well, that’s the mascot. He’s coming down. So I got pistol pete. They have shrimp. People are, there’s nice food. You’re, you’re in, you’re in a skyscraper 34 or 30 floors in the air looking out over to downtown Tulsa. I’ve never been to a classy place, let alone deejayed at one. I’m so nervous. What was your experience like?
Well, you know, at this point I’m ready to kind of cut loose and I have not planned much of this. So it was kind of an all new thing, so I knew it was going to a party. Um, you know, your best friends are there, your family’s there. It’s, you know, it’s just people you want to hang out with. I had no clue who clay was, who the Dj was going to be. Nope, no clue. So I had no expectations other than I knew I was going to have a good time. Um, so, you know, obviously the business coach backstory. I’m pistol Pete, I’m an, I’m a sooner fan. I went to ou, April’s side of the family, they’re all huge Osu fan, all, you know, like 10 generations of Osu. So here comes this, you know, this loan sooner with his friends and on the outcast. So here comes pistol pete though. So that was one highlight, rigid original highlight was when you introduced us and we, you know, we, I turned the corner in it, like you said, I’m like, you, I’m like Nascar, I’m, I’m that. I’m, I’m a fan. You know, I’m, I’m, I’m not used to this stuff. So when I walk around the corner, it just looks like a movie scene, right? And uh, you know, we’re getting introduced would come in. Okay.
I get so nervous every single time I ever introduced a couple ever. I would always get super nervous because you only get to at one time. So you look at the sheet and it says Mr and Mrs Joseph Lie, you know, so you have to say. All Right Ladies and gentlemen, once again, Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, please stand to your feet and hold time code. I don’t want to mess this up. I don’t want to mess this up. Please stand to your feet. Without any further ado, it’s my pleasure to introduce to you Mr. and Mrs Joe. And I’m just know the music’s playing and the pistol Pete Music’s going and it just like, and the whole time you just hope that the person who hears it receives it well because you know, I’m over there and the music’s playing and I’m just trying to like really, you know.
And then I remember seeing I will get the couples, they walk in and everyone’s cheering. I’m going to hope they don’t hate me, I hope they don’t hit me because I mean, I don’t want to screw up the intro to your reception every single time. It was like the worst nerve wracking experience and then I remember your wife is like kind of a tough egg to crack by the way your wife, she’s classy so she’s always kind of, this is what this is, this is what your wife’s thinking all the time. She’s thinking this is kind of going to screw up my wedding. He going to screw up my wedding and you just keep it. Then I moved probably 30 minutes in she kind of looks up and smiles and I’m like, yes, she’s happy. Good. And that every wedding was like that because you’re just hoping not to ruin somebody’s wedding.
I mean, that’s kind of the feeling. And we come back from the break I want you to share after the wedding, um, how did you become an orthodontist? Or, or, or how did you become a wedding or an orthodontist before the wedding? Talk to us about that, those early stages of becoming an orthodontist. And when did you decide you wanted to become an orthodontist and because we have so many listeners out there who are doctors and dentists and they’re in medical school or wanting to become a doctor, or maybe they are a doctor and they have no patience at all, that’s kind of a sad deal where they go to medical school and they have all these, uh, degrees and all this education, but they don’t know how to actually turn it into a thriving business. I want to tap into your genius and for those of you out there who are not familiar with Dr Joe Lye, I encourage you to check out his website at k, l, Ortho.com.
Uh, Dr Joe, how many locations do you guys have now? Kale, Ortho, or how many cities are you guys and I guess what cities are you in now? Or a main headquarters? The flagship is in Tulsa, Oklahoma. And then we a satellite once a week to Okmulgee and telequal. And we also go to Miami, Oklahoma. So my Ama, my ama, Okmulgee, Tahlequah and Tulsa, kl, Ortho Dot Com. Check them out during the break and by the way, if you want to save both time and money on your office supplies and I know you do go to onyx imaging.com. That’s onyx imaging.com. Now I want to spend a bunch of time and money at office depot. I don’t want to save money. Fine. If you don’t want to save money, don’t go to onyx imaging.com.
Once again, don’t go onyx imaging.com. If you don’t want to save time and money and now broadcasting live from the box that rocks. It’s the thrive time business coach radio show. The mindset stuff. For instance on the magic button was given a two street to back track so I can get the cash, making the plaques, bringing them back to the tracks so I can get up on the market, speak the facts. Live
nation. Welcome back to the daily Dojo of Mojo fo sho where we were focused on helping you to create both time and financial freedom and today’s guest is an orthodontist. He’s a father, he’s a husband, he’s a great American and his dad is from Vietnam. His mom is from Cuba and then his parents met as a result of his dad being on a shipping boat, if I’m correct. He was on a boat of some kind. They’re shipping vessel and they the port, they go into port in Cuba. They meet there and now you know the rest of the story. All right, so Dr Joe, we were kind of dateline the time of your wedding or kind of before your wedding here. Um, you’re graduating. Did you already graduate from medical school before the wedding or did you graduate after the wedding or when did you finish medical school?
Hey, fiddle, uh, actually dental school. I finished everything with my residency in 1997, maybe 1997. Yep. So did you always want to be an orthodontist or when, when did you decide, okay, I want to become an orthodontist.
Uh, that process started in dental school. Um, you know, if I, if I go back, how, you know, the kids asked me all the time, hi, how’d you know you wanted to be a dentist? Um, had no clue I wanted to be a dentist. Some, you know, like April my wife, she’s a pediatric dentists because we met in dental school and she knew that she wanted to be a dentist as a child from going to her dentist. Um, for me, I think what got the ball rolling as I actually worked for a dentist, which was my dentist and I just saw his lifestyle, um, you know, how, how, uh, he was always with his family and uh, you know, had, had a nice house, not with a number of the top but just I liked his lifestyle. So I’m in the back of my brain.
I always thought that and this will be pretty cool. So in college as I’m just kind of grinding through a kind of mindlessly, not really, I just knew I needed to graduate somehow. Yeah. And uh, you know, my roommate kept talking about dental school, dental school, dental school. And so I think that just kind of kept resonating in my head. And one day I looked into research, do a little bit and applied and the next thing you know, I get an acceptance letter. So I get into dental school and about my second, after my set, the summer after my second year, I have one of the professors from the orthodontic department asked me if I wanted to do a research project. At that point I really didn’t want to do it, but he said it’s a free trip to Orlando.
Oh, I’m all in. You’re all in. You got to do it.
Yeah, because I mean dental school is pretty taxing. I didn’t want to. I mean I had an add another thing to do. So that Kinda got the ball rolling. Uh, I got to be friends with the professor. Um, he started telling me more about orthodontics and straightening teeth and the, you know, again, the lifestyle and how you deal patients and your patient pool and you know, the more I got into it, it just made sense so to speak. And it just kinda evolved organically. It wasn’t like part of my plan, you know, smart friends. I want to tap into your. I want to tap into this real quick. This is [inaudible].
You grew up in a family where your parents were not orthodontists. So what did your parents, they were first generation immigrants, right? Your Dad’s from Vietnam, your mom’s from Cuba, right? What did they do? How did they achieve the American dream or how did they, how did they get by? They moved to the, I’m sure English wasn’t their native language. I know. How do they do it? What, what, what, what, what was it like growing up and what were your parents’ occupations? What did they do?
So, you know, they come over with, you know, literally with the dream because you’re leaving a, a communist situation where you’re told what to do, things are taken away. So just the freedom as what drove them, um, because when you’ve been stripped of your freedom, then you have a better understanding and appreciation of what this country is really was built on and what it’s about. So that’s what their drive came from. So, uh, you know, my father came in, he worked at a business coach restaurant, um, somehow he had these cooking skills, mad cooking skills, and he was a, uh, he was a cook at a Chinese restaurant. My mom was a seamstress and uh, that’s kind of what she did during the day and I was in my early years. I was raised by my grandmother and grandfather and parents are just grinding. They’re grinding it out, you know, I get dropped off earlier, you know, about 10:00 in the morning.
I guess I can kind of remember a little bit and they would pick me up at, you know, eight or 9:00 at night, but it’s just something I didn’t know any different. It wasn’t a bad thing. I just, you know, to this day, to this day out, you know, my grandmother, I mean, she’s just, she means the world to me. So, uh, at this point, my father, you know, he just, the thing about my father, he was a very ambitious and he just, he had a dream, you know, and he wanted to. He just knew that he wanted to open a restaurant on his own, right after he kind of did this chef deal. He looks around and finds a town Sapulpa Oklahoma Sapulpa.
Yes. For those people out there who are not familiar with SAPULPA support support is, is probably the leading a tourist destination in America. I mean, if you’re out there wanting to travel to a place where there are, you can find cows and cattle and you want to just look at. There’s a lot of sod farms out there, a lot of, um, there’s a lot of people that have buses and refrigerators and they’ll just put those on their front lawn and the let the vegetation growth through them and around them. If you want to see that. The number one tourist destination in Oklahoma.
You want to come on out to SAPULPA Google Sapulpa there. Somebody just google SAPULPA. Learn about SAPULPA chap. Put this up on the show notes for every. Can kind of get a little bit of a back because I want to make sure that people get this idea. So he found a town where he thought he could open up a restaurant that would do well in that town. Was Sapulpa now, what kind of restaurant did he open up?
Uh, this. Okay. So again, what you’re saying, you know, it’s Middle America at this time, if you came to me and said, do you think this is a great idea? I’d probably say no dad. But he was so driven that and my, you know, like you said, this is back in the early eighties and you know, oil’s doing well. So you know, the whole economy in Oklahoma is just, I mean it’s literally booming. So my father, and this is on the outskirts of the outskirts, skirts, that’s not even in the Mecca as the fob. It’s on the outskirts of the fall, but he opens up. It’s a cafe cafe. It’s a cafe old skool cafe. They serve breakfast, lunch, and dinner. This is American style. I’m back in the eighties and so here comes this Chinese guy in and he decides, Hey, I’m going to show you guys what Chinese food’s about. So I think my dad is kind of like the PF Chang before pf Chang and he opens up this. Yes nation. When we return, we’re going to hear the story of how Dr Joseph became the Pf Chang before the West peachtree. How he came here from the communist world of Vietnam, Cuba. He brought that work ethic in that grind and started that business coach number one tourism destination in the state broadcasting live from the center of the universe. It’s business school without the BS featuring optometrist turned entrepreneur. Dr Robert Zellner with us Sba entrepreneur of the year, Clay Clark Laptop
show 10, 12. We drop the knowledge bombs for you to make in so they can produce the greener we’d like all over again, super clunky, twitching cockpit. Japan’s cookie just bought and then you’ll be black and white, but set your wallet’s overweight. It used to be thin plate broadcaster with the same with the focus block in like San Quintin. Can I get into the old? Old To. You’ve heard the room was. He is in his pet. The C and R, upbeat the scene that was teaching business sales. Trump plate to z. We both grew up. Does that help? All right. Thrive nation. Welcome back to the thrive time show on your radio, and on today’s show we’re introducing you to a very special guest, a man, a myth in orthodontist who his dad was from Vietnam, born in Vietnam. His mom was from Cuba. His Dad does the next logical step. If you want to meet a virtuous woman, what you do is you get on a shipping boat of some kind. You’re going to vote with what kind of boat did your dad hop on in Vietnam. How would you describe the boat your dad was on?
I just, I’m just envisioning kind of a. just a, a fleet type of boat. Okay. Classic cruise boat or anything? Not a cruiser or you know, it’s not the love boat.
The love boat said we’ll be making in stop and Cuba. So he gets off the boat and he meets. So what, what, what, what, what, what’s your mom’s name? Rosa. Rosie meets Rosa and he says, Hey, I’m from Vietnam Year from Cuba. Both have kind of communist ties. Let’s leave this, this communist party and let’s go to America. So he goes to America, works at a restaurant, gets this crazy idea to start his own business, and so they’re from the tourists capital of the world. PULPA, Oklahoma. He starts a restaurant. He becomes the PF Chang. Before pf Chang, can you describe the business that your dad opened? The restaurant that maybe the decor, the menu, the grind, walk us through. What was it like living with a, a tycoon?
Have Sapulpa that’s a great question. Uh, so I literally grew up and lived in the restaurant. Oh Nice. And our, our first house was next door. It’s a little small pilot, a thousand square foot house, and that’s where, you know, in the. I grew up in state, in this office, um, after the, after it was sold. Uh, let’s see. And some around nine, 10, 91, uh, I go back to go see it. And you know, as a kid you always think these things are bigger than, than what they seem. So I’ll go back and I go, okay, this. I showed my wife, hey, this is kind of the restaurant and it’s at this point it’s, it’s something else to.
Is it still around? This is the building, right?
Yeah, that’s still around. I think they sell vitamins. It’s a health shop, like a holistic health shop, which is kind of ironic.
We need to do is we need to go there together on Ln date. I would love to go see it and then we can act like we think it’s still an Asian restaurant. We’ll just go in there and place an order. I would love to see it though. Seriously. So how, how big is it roughly? I mean the bill, do you remember how big it is? It’s probably
30,000 square feet. And you’re raised in this office essentially, which is probably what I was going by. This office is maybe a size of a closet, but to me, I mean I just lived there. I mean that’s what I did. I did my homework there, I ate there, I watch TV there. That was kind of my headquarters, so to speak.
Wow. How hard was your dad work and was he working like, you know, he’s seven hour day, so he was your. Was Your Dad working like seven? Because a lot of people they say I’m on my grind, baby. I get to work at eight $50, man. I take a lunch break right at noon. I come back right at 1230. I’m on my grind and I leave right at five. Oh five because I’m really grinding. How hard is your dad working at this point?
Hey, my dad’s getting there. Probably five in the morning because the restaurant’s opening at six or 6:30, I’m assuming because it’s a cafe. So you got your coffee drinkers coming in and your regulars and then uh, there’s no lunch break and then you move on to lunch and you move on to dinner. And my dad’s getting home at 11:00 at night.
Wait a minute. Ab, are you saying your dad didn’t take a break? This is six days a week. Oh, you see, one day off. One day. This is something I want to share with the listeners. You see the pilgrims that came over to America in search of freedom, right? It Kim over here, and what a lot of them would do is they knew they had to till the soil so the seeds water the seeds and reap a harvest and so what they would do is they would work, they’d get up about 8:50 in the morning or they did get about 7:50. They get to, they get to the fields about 8:50. They’ve start sowing business coach seeds and a lot of them if they’ve had like add or ocd or any type of. If they were ever offended, they would say, well gee brother Hezekiah, I’m not coming to work tomorrow.
And they would take their take massive lunch breaks. A lot of them would spend most of their day on facebook, you know, and a lot of them only worked on the days. They felt good and about half of them realized there was such a large welfare state available. Then about half of the pilgrims didn’t work at all. You know, they didn’t. They didn’t. And they realized there was going to be a government that would support them. So they were lazy. They knew that the government that was established, it consists of about 200 people would just take money from the other people and take about half of their checks and give it. So the. Here’s this, the, the, the initial pilgrims. That’s how we built our country, was just taking a bunch of lunch breaks, talking about being offended. We all had different mental ailments and forms of anxiety. A lot of us said, I just, I have carpal tunnel.
I can’t possibly sell the seeds today. No, we didn’t do that in anybody who’s a first generation immigrant. They get it. And I’m just telling you, this is one thing I respect about you is you guys. I tell my clients, all Thomas did you have to work like an immigrant. If you’re going to start a business, you do have to work like an immigrant, but you don’t have to stay that way. You can. You can think about how you want your life to be different. So I want to get into your mindset that Dr Joe, when being raised by a first generation immigrant, essentially being raised out of a restaurant, seeing your dad work like that, how did that impact your worldview for the better, for the worst? What was going. How did that impact you and your dad worked like that? How did that impact you?
Well, you know, there’s good and bad to clay because, you know, my dad, he only knew one way and that was, you know, he’s grinding it out and you know, the way he was raised, he was a farmer family of, of a 10. My mom was from a family of eight. So, um, from an early age, I’m assuming that he just, in the way he, he kind of did things on his own so to speak. Uh, he just kinda was a grinder. So what I did learn from him, I’m just through the process of, of living, it is just a, the will of just finding a way so to speak. He just found a way to him. There were no problems because I just wrote, remember if, if it, if something needed to be done, he just got it done. Like he didn’t worry about what people thought, what, what obstacles will bring them.
A lot of sick days that he talked about being offended a lot. Did he?
I remember one time him not going into work for a week and it’s because he was shout, shout shoveling snow in the parking lot and he fell and he broke. He broke his hand.
Now I suppose if you break a hand, you get to. I mean this sincerely. If you’re an entrepreneur. I mean this sincerely. I am now 37. I’ve been self employed for 21 consecutive years and I have never taken a day off.
I mean, I don’t think vacation, you know what I’m saying? I’ve never missed a dinner at a sick day. Right. Not One sick day. I even if I’m crazy sick, the guys in the office, no, I just do the dayquil thing. Right. And it’s, to me it’s more of like a cal ripken sorta streak right now. I’m like, it’s 21 years and no sick days. I can’t make. I can’t have a sick day now, so you just got like, I got to keep it going. Eventually. I’ll probably have a sick day, but you just gotta grind. We come back. We’ll hear more about the Dr Joe Lye story right here on the thrive time. Show on your
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and podcasts. Download from Vietnam and from Cuba. Dr Joe, his parents are from. His Dad is from Vietnam. His mom’s from Cuba. They came to America and they started a restaurant in these sprawling, beautiful metropolis known as Sapulpa Oklahoma, which for those who don’t know, Sapulpa Oklahoma. Ah, let me, let me speak A. There’s a support open language to you if you are in supply. Like if I were to say to you right now, hey, do you know where the bathroom is? The SAPULPA translation would be, hey man, do you know where the bathroom is there a bag out and you want to say by God to end the statement because you want to indicate you have relationship with God or you believe in God by God. And a lot of times in Sapulpa, like if I were to say to you like, Hey, do you know where my shoes are?
The SAPULPA translational be. Well, I’ll tell you what, I’ll put a pot not on your head if you ain’t going to show me where my shoes are. I mean it’s. This SAPULPA is kind of a, a redneck. Ian Meets people that aren’t redneck communities. That mean Dr Joseph. Isn’t it right on the threshold of redneck villas that have you. I mean how you would describe the. Because it’s right there where it’s under the division where the rednecks, there’s not as many rednecks, but there still are a few redneck outposts. I mean, what would you describe as the bumper? That way? You know, that’s pretty close at the time because I mean, in the eighties it was very, uh, western high net. Now it’s now it’s a, it’s more of a suburban community. Yes. Now it is. Right. And so your dad started in, in an Asian restaurant there. What was the name of this restaurant?
It was called the oriental steakhouse. Yes. The Oriental steakhouse. So we’re going to go there mentally. The Oriental steakhouse. Here we go. Did your dad play overhead and music in this place? No. No, no, no. That’d be too over the top. How did he come up with the name Oriental steakhouse? I don’t know. I have to ask my mom. I never asked her that question. Just we called it the orientals. Gosh, the short payoff. Now here’s the offensive questions I want to ask and I’ll ask them all in a row and that we can move on here. The offensive questions. You’re Asian? Yes. When I did commercial real estate, when the Asian person would call about business coach leasing space, I just want to, I want all the listeners to know that this is true. This is real. You talk about this, this is real stuff. When I did commercial real estate, if we got a call from an Asian who wanted to lease space, all of the commercial owners, because there’s, if you want to lease space, you’re gonna lease space from a landlord and I mean it’s without exception.
Every single landlord that I worked with either said to me directly or inferred, they would prefer to lease to Asians because Asians don’t lose. They don’t quit. It’s like the hardest working people, group Asian immigrants. I’m telling you, every single tenant that we leased space too, that was Asian. They do not go into bankruptcy. Nine out of 10 businesses fail in America, but these Asian people, they will move into the building. Look, they will literally live in the back of the, of their, of their, uh, business and they won’t go home. They’ll just work and work and they will grind. And they’re a very industrious people. They’re hard working people the hardest. I’m just telling you, the commercial real estate people. I worked with landlords. One guy pulled me aside one day, he goes, here’s the deal. Do not lease me. Do not bring me another tenant who is Caucasian. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of these hipsters starting their stupid businesses that fail. Get me an Asian and I’m like, got it boss. But I mean, can you talk to me about the industrious grind? Because I mean the, I walk us into the Asian home because the work ethic is unbelievable.
Yeah, it’s a, it’s a, uh, it’s a different mindset. Um, you know, growing up, you don’t know any different, but I’m at the restaurant was the way of life. It wasn’t just, like I said, I grew up in the restaurant and you got to remember back in the, in the early eighties, there was no ripping, opening a bag and dumping into French fries. We were making all our own food was organic before organic. So my dad’s back there and we’re back there helping to peel the potatoes. Were slicing them, putting them in a hamburger’s. He’s grinding his own meat. Are you being paid? Uh, I got food and shelter.
So yes. So many people. But I’m just telling. I went to a speaking event in South Dakota and a group of Democrats recently, we’re trying to pass a law that would forbid parents from having their kids work in their business more than a certain number of hours and all of the commercial farmers, all of the people, this is their job, the farming communities, all of these farmers were saying, listen, we will go out of business if our kids can’t work for free because we can barely make it anyway. And if they limit the number of hours, kids can work because you’re probably as a kid working 40 hours a week, 50 hours a week, helping your parents in the business while going to school,
I’m assuming. So in the summer. So there’s no break.
How did or break, how did your parents process, uh, you getting a c or a d on a report card?
Uh, not really. Well, because, you know, at that point, you know some backstory now because, so if, if my parents are working all the time, um, you know, what I’m trying to do is I’m trying to get out of the restaurant because I’m there all the time so, you know, I, I see know my thing was sports or just kind of cleaning with two friends that would take me, take me out of the work environment there for, to give me a break. So I guess I’m getting back at is that, you know, my dad, uh, it was tough for him to be at certain events or school things, um, if at all. So, you know, at that point you have the mentality of you just get it done and you grind. So, uh, when you, when you talk about schoolwork and that kind of stuff, it’s just something that you did, um, because it, I think because you were just instilled in you and you saw it, you lived it.
One thing that’s interesting for me is as a parent, I’m Caucasian. This Justin, I am Caucasian, but we won’t be. We’ll walk you through this idea. My kids play piano. Okay, so my kids all play pen. I require my kids every week to go to piano lessons, drum lessons. They have to. They can’t stop until they move out the house. Okay. Because music, if you can play an instrument and it impacts the way you think. And so my kids have to do a piano. They have to have. They all have tutors. They have to do it. I want them to do well academically and it’s not a conversation. They just have to do it. Well, this is a true story. My kids will show up at the recital and they’re playing a song like and now our first song will be played by Havana Clark. She is six years old and she’ll be playing Mississippi hotfrog.
So van is like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And there’s like 400 parents and you’re like, oh yeah, that’s good. Good. Now our next performer is Suzuki Matsumoto who is six years old and he’ll be playing Beethoven’s whatever and he’s like bumped by that. But at, at, at, at data data, data, data, data, data, he’s just stoically just banging it out. And I’m like, what the crap. My son goes to hockey, he played hockey and my son does skating lessons and my daughter did figure skating lessons and it’s like a now Havana Clark at age eight will be performing the Yada Yada. And then they’re like, and she’ll be performing very basic, rudimentary, very basic skating skills. And then they’ll say and now much Zumo Suzuki will be performing the. And he threw like doing like triples out cows.
They’re doing triple toe loops. These kids are awesome. And so I’m talking to the parents. I love talking to these Asian parents. I love these guys. I said, sir, I want to ask you, your daughter is awesome on the piano. How many hours a week does she practice? Oh, well we do five hours a day. I’m like, really? What can we do? Like an hour a week in the Clark House, you know, for piano. He’s like, well, we do just five hours a day. You ask, the kid is awesome at hockey, you know? Gosh, how often does your kid practicing? Well, we actually have our own a skating rink we’ve built in our basement. Like what? Yeah, it’s actually an invitation hockey. We skate down there. He has to do three hours after business coach school every day. Really? I mean, so can you talk to me about just that mindset that culturally I see it. I mean it’s just, this is not a racist statement when I say if you look at the patterns, most of the Asian families that I have been around you guys grind. It’s just a work ethic that just not there amongst most of the Caucasian families I know what’s going on. What does that grind come from? You know? Um, I can just speak from experience. I think what you’re saying
fine in the Asian, uh, is that they take the emotion out of it. Okay. So yes, you can’t come in and go, like you said, I don’t, I feel bad.
Okay. So you feel bad. Okay. We acknowledged it. Then you move on. Okay. You’re still going, still going to work here, you know? Yeah, I see it. I think you got some Asian blood and it doesn’t matter how you feel and the Caucasian community. This is how the. This is the, this is how Caucasians handle problems. They go, how do you feel about it? Bailey? And then four or five people say you need to see a therapist to see a chiropractor. Maybe you need to maybe have ocd. Do you need a little medication? Right? You go to the Asian home and it’s like a bill. You have a hard time paying attention. Why don’t you shut the heck up and get back to am I right? Well, I mean in the age there’s no question. You just. Again, you just do it. There’s not a lot of conversation going on. How do you feel? There’s not a lot of shocking. So yes, it’s just more of action. Adopt me. So I want to be Asian. I want to be adopted by you. I just love that grind. We come back. We’re going to talk about the stoic and mindset and how Dr Joe Manages personalities in his office because managing Americans, I believe is the hardest thing in the world. You talk about good work ethics. I think the worst work ethic and the world is the average American. I think Americans are the worst employees.
My take on stage
hey, you are now entering the Dojo of Mojo and the thrive time show, thrive time. Show on the microphone. What is this? Top of the charts in the category of business written down on business topics like we are a dentist, provided you with internships over the past that you might get. Motion sick. Grab a pen and pad to the nab in Buxom. Sobered three, two, one. Here come the business. All right. Thrive nation. Welcome back to your daily Dojo of Mojo fo sho. I’m
going to say some very controversial things next and the things I I’m saying are going to be all supported with facts and so I’m gonna. Have Eric put them on the show notes. Check. Are you ready for the Phantasmagoria? The cornucopia of negativity, but oh my God, no, I’m not, but let’s do anyways. Here we go. My thesis is that the average American employee is terrible, so anytime we have a president that gets up and says pandering to the crowd America, we have some of the most industrious, hardest working people in the world. I would say if I was running for office, which is why I would never win, I’d say Americans, how are you guys? Good to see you guys. Seventy five percent of you, according to the US Chamber of Commerce and CBS News, 75 percent of you here today steal from the workplace. So that’s exciting.
So I need the 25 percent of you that don’t steal to go ahead and vote for me now, real quick. Now we also have, according to ink magazine, and by the way, I want your vote. I want your vote. Please vote for me. Clay Clark for president here. According to ink magazine, over 80 percent of you lie on your resumes. Yes, yes. What great people we have now also, according to the Washington Post, all the men out there. This is for you guys. I’m so excited for you guys. Seventy eight percent of the men who were, who have a chance to vote for me. If you’re one of the 78 percent who have an affair on your spouse, 78 percent according the Washington post of men today surveyed. This is people in a survey who admit to this, what kind of people admit to this? Seventy eight percent of people admit to having an affair with their against their current spouse.
So you say 78 percent of people have an affair. Eighty percent of people lie on resumes. Seventy five percent of people steal it. Now let’s hire them. Let’s bring them to the place. So my contention is the hardest part of growing a business and managing a business, managing humans in America. Because the laws treat every employee like they’re a victim. So if you fire them, they can file unemployment against you. If you hold them accountable, they can say, well, you made me feel bad recently. This is a true story. We had a lady who graduated from a local hair school and I asked her to cut hair at Dr Joe. I said, can I need you? Step one is you shadow for an hour step twos, I need you to go to the location and we’re going to offer to cut a customer’s hair for free in exchange for um, them letting us do a demo cut and we’re going to pay them $42.
So the guy’s gonna leave with 42 bucks and he gets a haircut for free so you can demonstrate your hairstyle. We just want to see what you can do. That’s how it works. And she says, true story, I have anxiety when I cut here. And I said, so how did you graduate from Harris School? True Story. She says, well, you can actually graduate and not ever cut hair if you have anxiety. True Story. I have a family member of mine. He actually got a college degree as a result of taking up a legal battle with the college he went to and he claimed that he had anxiety and he didn’t do well with test taking. This is the person at a four point, oh, in high school by the way. And so therefore they gave him a degree as opposed to fighting with him. So there’s people out there that have degrees who kingdom was one man who went to college with my wife, and I’m not exaggerating, he literally cannot read or write the English language.
And when Vanessa graduated, her dad said, how do you feel about getting your degree of Essex that came in from Kentucky to go to the Babycenter at oral Roberts University to cheer for Vanessa. When she got her degree in 2002 and Vanessa said, if that person got a degree, my degree has no value because anybody, you can just go to college for four consecutive years now and get a degree. And so these people come to the workplace now and I’m sure Dr [inaudible] you’ve never. Because I have really good people at the elephant in the room. It’s because we interview so many people and we go through so many interviews. Can you talk to me about managing people as an orthodontist? Has it been difficult for you? Is it easy for you? Because now you have a really good team of people, but I’m sure in the past you’ve had to manage some dif, difficult humans. Talk to me about the degree of difficulty with managing humans in America
today. Southern, you know, I’m coming up on 19 years of. Oh yeah, private practice. So I’m managing people has evolved for me as well as all my other managing skills and know for sure that is the hardest part. Um, early, early on, you know, I’m, I’m just kind of seeing trends. Um, and you got to remember too, I mean from 1999 when I started all the way to 2000, 18, 19 years, the, the type of people that you’re hiring changes in their mindset changes. So, uh, what worked when I first came into practice, um, is different than what the style that I bought that I’ve evolved to now. So, um, I don’t know if there’s a magic formula. I think it just, you have to create a, you have to get the right a collection of people so to speak. So, um, number one, I would say what, you know, what’s the position you’re hiring and what type of person do you need? So if I’m hiring a manager, I’m not going to, I’m not going to go out and find a introverted person.
So it was, listen to your listeners, take notes on this because this right here is powerful. He’s, he’s, he’s very good at this. This is very actionable stuff. So you’re saying think about the kind of personality type you’re trying to hire for the position. So you’re thinking if you’re looking for a manager, what kind of personality type are we looking for here? Yeah. So someone like really meek and meager doesn’t like confrontation or. Yeah.
So I, you know, I stumbled upon this at a meeting and they talked about personality types and there’s all kinds of personality tests. And uh, this one was pretty simple. I mean, there’s, this was based on animals. Um, um, number one would be a lab that’s kind of the person that doesn’t like confrontation, but they’re always wanting to please you. And they’re always, you know, what you’re going to get. Okay. So, and then you have your beaver, which is kind of your work. Are there, the grinder, they’re always going to make lists. They’re going to, um, um, be very organized. Um, and then you have your lie and which is a strong personality type. They’re gonna dominate the room. I’m going to dominate the room one to pump it up. Yes, they’re, they’re gonna, uh, you know, take hold of a situation and just run with it. And then you have your, what they call an odd or they’re kind of like the uh, um, they make things from a personality standpoint. They’re the extrovert and you know, they’re, they make things fun.
Does an otter make this sound shop? Is it more like a. those are little otters are little tiny. You’re thinking to just thinking of a sea lion. You know, I’m going to do real quick, I’m going to play some audio sound effects because I want to make sure that we all have an accurate. This is important. Now this is big because a lot of times I think people are out there saying, honor, what’s the honor? Because I want to make sure we’re getting this on audit. Let me. Can we queue up otter? Otter sounds. Let me just real quick. Let me get this. This is powerful stuff here. Let me get. This is a um. Okay. A young river. Otter.
Can we get that doesn’t sound like what I thought it sounded like it all until two. This? Yeah. Oh, I’ll look into this. I want to hear some more audit on or something. My wife loves otters. Really? Okay.
Okay. Back to you. I just want to make sure we hear it. A Good Otter. Otter sound there. The manager personality types. You have the lab.
The lab is the kind of the, the, the, the soldier. God just kind of go along to get along. Yeah. They just go with the flow and I do exactly what they’re told. Got It. And then the lines, your general, they get things done and they take hold and the otters Kinda the, the, the person that binds everybody together. Okay. Okay. And then you got your beaver. They’re like the taskmaster. Okay. You put them on a task, they’re going to figure out how to get from a to b. and I’m taking notes here with listeners, so I’m making sure we’re getting this down here. So the, the beaver describe what the beaver does again, the beaver, the beaver’s like you’re a taskmaster. Got It. Okay. They’re making lists. They’re figuring out, you know, is this the right way? Is this the wrong way?
The does what now? What was it underneath the otter?
Uh, the, yeah, the team builder. They’re like the extroverted person to the fun. The, the,
the fly for the party. So Chubb, Chubb is the office odder chilled water. Tap on my shoulder. Action. Now the, the, the beaver. So I want to, I want to put this down in the chapel in the show notes. So the otter is the extrovert, the extrovert, and the team builder. Now the beaver is the task master? Yes. Okay. And the lion is the what, what, what was the line too?
The line is like the general or the take charge.
Okay. And then the soldier is, is uh, the lab. The lab was like the soldier. Yeah, there you go. Okay, so talk to me about what kind of personality types you try to put in your office and we’re where each one of these personalities should fit in and how that all creates that, that right ecosystem. Because if you get a tea, by the way, if you screw up an ecosystem, things get toxic, you know, if you remove a certain kind of life form from an ecosystem, it gets toxic and it gets weird. And so talk to me about how you keep the ecosystem healthy at Kirkpatrick and Lai orthodontics. Right? So this is kind of assuming too, as a manager, you’ve got to assess yourself, are you a lab or you align your, an otter or you’re a beaver because that comes into play as well. What are you? Um, and again, you can be a mixture of any of these part otter and water, that’s what it’s called. I’m a, I’m a heavy beaver and some line. Okay. So, uh, that, you know, so this, I think the different business coach personality types, Lynn, to your style. So, I mean, if you’re, say by nature you’re an otter. Okay. And uh, as a manager, you know, you’re always going to make things pretty lively in your office, but you might be lacking in the managerial skills or the enforcement skills discipline. Yes. You might get, they’d be like, man, I love working for him, but he doesn’t show up on time every time or not everything’s getting done. Yeah. So then you know, for that person when the pie, the really need a super strong line to stay on top of them yourself. So you know, so that’s Kinda you gotta assess yourself first, I would believe to figure out what works for your system.
So now let’s say that you have a business and most of our listeners have a business with, you know, a lot. We have a lot of listeners who are startups. We have, we have, I’d say the vast majority of our listeners have a business with probably 10 to 20 employees. The African American business, according to Forbes, 65 percent of the jobs that have been created in the past decade have been created by small business owners. So that’s people that have less than 50 employees. Where I think it starts to get weird is when you have, let’s say, an orthodontic practice and you have people that just cannot grasp the concept of showing up to work on a consistent basis. People that just cannot string together five consecutive days of being at work or people that just cannot be on time. And at a very basic level. I mean an Archi will become the normal if you don’t become an effective manager. I mean, chip, how many clients have you coached where they’re having had, had a problem with managing people?
All of them, like literally every single client that have problems do they have with managing people. Um, it depends on, you know, like, like Joe was saying, the role that they’re in a lot. Um, a lot of times they get these real bulldog managers, but then these people don’t know how to connect and build a team. They don’t have any of these other characteristics or they have a problem managing themselves so they haven’t controlled their own life first. And then they try to manage other people. And there’s that chaos and anarchy. You’re talking about
Sean, you’ve coached with clients, the clients that you’ve coached with you. Have you ever had a client you’ve worked with have problems with managing people?
Yeah, definitely. Like chip said, it’s like almost all of them for one reason or another because like Dr Joe was talking about, they all have different strengths, but a lot of times maybe the business owners don’t know kind of what their strengths are and haven’t ever evaluated any of them, their employees on those.
On a very basic level, if you’re struggling to get people to show up, to work on time, you’re struggling to get people to make an outbound sales call. You’re struggling to get people to not steal. You’re struggling to get people to not fight with each other. You want to stay tuned. We’re going to deal with all of those issues from the manatee need. Self proclaimed. I’m proclaiming the Management Guru, Dr Joe Lye because he’s not out there writing books about management. He is managing people. He’s not theoretically teaching you how to do it. He actually does it and so you want to stay tuned. It’s the thrive time show on your radio and podcasts down. Stay. Two, three,
three, two, one. Boom. You are now entering the Dojo of Mojo and the thrive time show,
thrive time. Show on the microphone. What is this? Top of the charts in the category of business coach driven down on business topics like we are a dentist provided you with into shift lacking. If we go past that, you might get motion sick in this group. Like some Florida.
Three, two, one. Here come the business ninjas.
All right. Thrive nation. Welcome back to the thrive time show
on your radio and podcast downloads. We’re talking today about something that is very, very hard to do until you learn the principles and then it becomes super easy and that is managing people. And so what I wanted to do for today’s show is I wanted to bring on somebody who is a management expert and you say have a written books about it. No. Do they speak on it? No. How are they an expert? Uh, well, they’ve actually run a business for how many years have you been a partner with Kirkpatrick and Lai orthodontics? There Dr Joe, uh, this fall will be 19 years and if you go into Kirkpatrick and Lai orthodontics, they have a really well managed team. Are they perfect? No, I’m just saying objectively, as a consumer, I’ve had many of my friends and family, my own daughter goes to Kirkpatrick and Lai orthodontics because there’s no jackass are.
And if there is jack ass raid happens behind the scenes because it’s tightly managed. And so people come to work there and they show up on time. They keep the place clean. Uh, you don’t have massive health code violations everyday. You’re not doing it. You walk in there it, um, it, it, it feels credible and it feels safe. It feels clean. It, it, it’s confidence inspiring is how I would describe it. Inspires confidence when you walk in. Everything about it is professional. So behind the scenes though, they have to manage people, get them to show up to work on time, get them to be honest, not to steal, get them to have to manage people. And they’ve done a great job of assembling and all star team. But that did not happen overnight. It’s taken years to build that team. So Dr. Joe, can you talk to us from your perspective, what has been the hardest part of building that great team you now have at Kirkpatrick in life? You know, um, it’s, you know, again, it’s figuring out who your employees are and how do
they best fit in the roles that you, that you have and you know, the team deal. It’s thrown out a lot, but it is true. I mean that a good team, they care for each other. They got each other’s back and if you get the right people, you know, they’re always asking questions. You know, I always want to, I want to know am I, what can we do to be more efficient? So not so much. This is just the way we always did it. Okay. No, what can we do to make your job more efficient and get things to run more smooth? Um, you know, and so once you get the personality types tied in, I’m a and you get the right mix, then things just kind of start to flow because when you have turmoil, that’s, you know, that’s the drama. Gossip, drama, rumors. Yeah. It’s just culture killers. Yeah.
So here’s the, here’s the problem, I find it. Most people have the courage to complain, but not the courage to quit. So it was kind of that underlying rw Murray gossipy negative atmosphere that will happen if you’re not an effective manager. And people say, clay, why? Why do you love the New England patriots so much? I’ll tell you why, because every year bill bellacheck has a salary cap, like every other team and every year as the head coach of the New England patriots, he asked to assemble a team of professional athletes. These are people who are mercenaries and they are going to do a job as long as you pay them well, and then as soon as they do really well, as soon as the team wins the super bowl or goes every year, the Patriots go deep into the playoffs or they win the super bowl every year and when they go deep into the playoffs that they want a superbowl, their star receiver, who by the way was a nobody two years before, says, I don’t wanna.
I don’t wanna play anymore unless I get a huge check and they can’t pay everybody a huge amount so they have to then trade them or cut them or move onto every single year. The mastery of bill bellacheck is every year, you understand if you win a superbowl, they make your. Or if you go to the superbowl, they make your schedule the next year, the toughest it can be to make parody happened, right? The NFL makes your schedule’s super hard the next year and they take away draft pick, so you get the worst draft picks and the toughest schedule in the event that you are successful. That’s why no one constrained together. Five years of success, let alone 20. So bill bellacheck every year assembles this Dream Team and I love professional sports because it’s so similar to running a business. Your people, as soon as they get good, your competitor will come into your place of business and try to hire away your top talent.
So I want to ask Dr Joe this question, what has been the hardest part, but when you, when you, when managing people were, you said to yourself, gosh, I didn’t realize. I think my wakeup calls. The first time I had, I realized that all of the men working in my office were stealing from me. All of them. Like the. I literally realized with Dj Connection, I had probably 20 Djs at the time and there’s probably seven or eight in the office and all of them were stealing stuff from me everyday. I mean I did. When I first realized that all of them were doing it hurts. I thought there was just one and then if there was just too and I found out they all knew about it. Then I discovered they all know about it, they’re probably all doing it and I realized every single employee I have here is stealing from me.
That was my biggest wake up call. My biggest kind of a welcome to business moment. I mean that’s when I realized like, oh no, darth vader might be real. I mean it was just like when I realized like Santa Smokes Santa was a guy. It’s like you go to the mall to get it, to get a photo with Santa and then you see sand out back. I’m on break kid, I’m on break, hit to business coach smoking and that’s how I felt. I’m like, okay, that’s not real Santa. There’s lots of Santa. I want to be just that mind wracking moment. Do you remember for, as a manager the first time where you thought to yourself, this is a lot harder, this isn’t about just teeth anymore.
Joe, do you remember that? Yeah, I for sure. I mean now the orthodontic part’s the easy part. It’s the official managing and all the marketing and all that kind of stuff. But, you know, from a management standpoint of people, um, as time has progressed, is finding and being able to keep people motivated. Uh, once you find how do you do it, how do I keep a motor?
How do you keep your team rowing in the same direction year after year?
Yeah. I, you know, again, finding the right people and then also yourself. I mean I have to find ways myself when I go in to keep them motivated, uh, with my attitude and my actions and I kind of stuff because I mean at the end of the day, your names on the sign and you’re the leader of the pack, but I’m not a micromanager, you know, so I don’t sit there and just try to keep, try to tell people what to do and stay on top of them that much because I do want and in my office give people freedom to make things happen and, and, and have their own personality, um, of how they do things.
I would just say my anecdotal, a little comment here from the outside looking at it objectively, you pretty much have a jackass free zone. Therefore, that works, but there’s a lot of people, a one of our listeners who’ve messed up and hired their daughter or their son or their wife or their husband or somebody they know, a friend from college and they are a jackass and they don’t want to be honest with the situation. So when you have a jackass on your team, then you have to micro manage. You got to stand behind them all the time. You got to police them all the time that you had and what are they saying? Right? So we come back. I want to talk about time freedom. Now I want to move into time freedom and financial freedom because Dr Joe and I have shared the same philosophy that business exists to create time freedom for your family and I want that. That’s a mindset that a very few people agree with, but I want to talk about time freedom, financial freedom, faith, family, finances, and balancing all of that stage and it’s the thrive time show on your radio
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to sell you on why you should listen to this segment of today’s show. I want you to think about some facts and Chubb. I want to put the facts on the show notes so they’re not my opinions. According to Forbes, nine out of 10 businesses fail. Nine out of 10. That means if you’re in an o and an a conference of 100 people who are all business owners, 90 of them will fail. Now of the businesses that actually survive, of the businesses that actually survives, there’s only 10 out of 100 and survive. What percentage of those business owners actually have time freedom where they actually don’t work 80 hours a week? What made of the 10 businesses that make it, what percentage of the owners actually have time freedom and there’s not enough data out there for me to give you a statistic, I can just say having coached thousands of businesses either at conferences or workshops or one on one, I can tell you I believe that less than three percent of business owners ever achieve financial freedom.
Absolutely. Or time freedom. Yeah, because I see business owners that have financial freedom, but they don’t have time freedom because they’ve bought into the lie that they need a bigger house, a bigger car, a bigger business, a bigger house, a bigger car, a bigger business. They never get to a place where they say, I am thankful for what I have and now I will focus on my family. So they spend their entire life chasing their dreams only to come back at the end of their life with regret and want to be home with their family. And it’s a crazy thing to see someone who’s trying to run and grow a business, but when the better the business does the worst their life gets. Age Twenty seven was when I stopped chasing my dream and realize that my dream was to have a great family, right? And I had already achieved my goals.
So Dj connection, the guys wanted to take it national. We were in Dallas, we were in Kansas City and I realized I don’t want to go anywhere to expand. In fact, I want to contract and I remember telling Vanessa, I want to go down from 4,000 events a year. I want to do like 400 events a year and I just want to live on land and be away from humans because I don’t want more people to manage were already financially free. I just want to have time freedom. I just want to be with you. I don’t want to be with them. I’m spending my whole business coach day. I married you. I’m spending my entire day with them. Why am I spending my time with them and not with you? I want to mentor my own kids. I don’t want to mentor all my employees all the time.
I don’t want to deal with unemployment all the time. I want to. So that’s why like our Thrive Time Show business coaching program will never grow it beyond 160 clients because I don’t want to make it bigger. Right? I don’t want to do that. No people, no problem. And there’s one guy who, one of my clients, one of our, one of my friends that I’ve worked with for years that shares this worldview. And that’s Dr Joe Lye, Dr Joe, can you tell me how you balance faith, family and finances? Talk to me about the priority of faith, family and finances because you have a counter cultural worldview. Worldview that I share.
Yeah. I kind of had an epiphany, a, I call it a conversion. This was about three years, about four years ago. Yeah. Um, where my spiritual life, my family life and my work life. I’m just, we’re in turmoil. But with this conversion, uh, in my spiritual life, um, I realized that that area was lacking in that area is lacking. Nothing else was working. So once, uh, I got my spiritual life in order, I realized that that needs, that. It applies to all aspects of my life, my family. And my workplace, um, so from there I always, it’s not that my business took a seat. Um, I, I always tried to balance them, but there’s only so much time, like you said, that you can give to each one. So if I had to rank order the three, you know, I would go, my spiritual life has to as number one because that’s what, that’s the engine that makes what makes things so the faith is first, faith is first, family is second, and then my business life is third, which is kind of doesn’t make sense. And in what we’re talking about because we’re talking about business.
See this is the thing is I think that my entire reason for doing this show and if people are listening to the show consistently, we’ll figure that out. My entire goal is to help you have success, to create time freedom and financial freedom. So as an example, this is how I process things and why you do too. So this is an example. Recently I got asked to speak in Oklahoma City. Basically we’d like you to come speak. And I said, okay, you don’t talk to the I, I was kind of frankly frustrated that I was on the phone with a person and I said, I just want you to know I appreciate you very much, but I’m not going to speak. And they said, well, we have a, um, a $10,000 honorarium available available for you. If it’s a money thing, we could raise that up a little bit.
And I said, I, um, I can’t, I don’t want to speak. He said, can you teach entrepreneurship? This is a group of entrepreneurs. I mean, this is your, your, your people. And I know, but I have a podcast. And the reason why is because I want to teach people entrepreneurship. Yes. And if they tune into the podcast could do that or come to the workshops, but I, I don’t speak. And they’re like, but you could grow your audience. I don’t know if that makes sense to you. I don’t want to grow my audience. And you’re like, you don’t want to grow your audience. Like, no. Uh, recently an employee said, why don’t we get more involved on instagram? There’s this thing on instagram where we could get up there and we could make this go viral and we could boost this youtube video to get more clicks and more likes and more downloads. And um, I explained to a lot of times said, I don’t want to make more money
and this is, this is where Dr Joe and I were our relationship. This is, to me, this is the spiritual aspect of our relationship and I’ve never shared this with you, but I stopped deejaying because it was not conducive to me having a good family because I dj every single, every Friday, every Saturday, every Sunday. And every single holiday. I even deejayed one time on Christmas morning. I’ve deejayed every holiday. I mean every New Year’s eve for years. And uh, so I had retired from Dj and this crazy guy over here, Dr Joe is. He is, I think it was your wife called me and she said, could you dj one more time, one more time? And I hadn’t deejayed in years. And I’m like, I just, I love Dr Joe. He’s a good friend of mine. I would do it for you, but nobody else. So I come home. I tell Vanessa, Vanessa, I’m going to Dj one more time. She says, what don’t you do? Did you promise to Dj for what? Who are you deejaying for us at Dr Joe. She is. Okay. Okay. This is the final show she knows what’s the evidence? Dr Joe, can you describe your 40th birthday party on the rooftop of the Mayo Hotel? Because this event will forever live in infamy because it was so awesome from my perspective, but can you explain from your perspective, what was that event like for you?
That was the most epic behind the wedding because we never get to finish the wedding store, but behind the wedding, which is kind of alluded to, this is the most epic party I have ever been a part of scene and you know the brain. I didn’t think it was going to happen, so when I say again, it was a surprise, they bring them around the room. I had no clue unfold. I hear the voice Dr Hill and I’m like, oh, they didn’t. Oh No, you did. Yeah. Dj Clay is bad. Oh my God. Oh, this would be like, um, I’m having prince like Princeton. He just quit performing so there’ll be like print and you know, I love prints those April be like bringing prints back onstage is like the equivalent of getting. And
there was a, I mean this, I mean this humbling. There was a large margin between how good I was and every other Dj. My Best Dj was like eight times less good than I was and so I would just get spiritual with these events and so we come back, I want to tell you about his birthday party and some of the crazy things that happened at his birthday party and balancing faith family and finances and how Dj one last show led to one other, one last show. Dr. Eleanor’s daughter because he heard that I, you know, you can’t get out of this one buddy. You have to Dj for my daughter. I heard you’re out of retirement.
I see Vanessa new and then it led to another referral and then I had to just go the person and not call them back and I had to block them from my phone. A dear friend of mine had to block them from my phone because I would not dj your daughter’s wedding. True story stay. Two, three, three, two, one. Boom. You are now entering the Dojo of Mojo and the thrive time show, thrive time. Show on the microphone. What is this? Top of the charts in the category of business driven down on business topics like we are a dentist. Like if we go so past that you might get motion sick. Grab a pen and pad to the NAB. That’s good.
Three, two, one. Here come the business ninjas.
Welcome back to the world headquarters of learning, earning and burning. That’s all I do. I do at Camp Clark and chicken palace. Learn, earn and burn. It’s true because I love, I love a time freedom and financial freedom in that. And I have the time freedom and financial freedom to do whatever I want. And uh, Dr Joe told me years ago, he says, Hey, you’re about two years ago, you said if your radio show ever becomes like your Dj show, that’ll be a thing, but if not, you know, tell me when it becomes like that, just tell me because then I’ll be business coach interested. And so it took me a while to get the format and that’s why we have all the intros we have now and all the crazy lyrical miracles and all the things we do. And so, but we’re basically trying to recreate the magic of a gift God gave me, which was dj and I was obsessive about deejaying. So let me explain to you what happened.
I had retired from teaching. Dr Joe’s wife calls me and says, will you Dj for my husband’s wedding? I said, ah, she’s one my favorite customers. I said, I, I can’t. She said, please will pay a more. We’ll do I, it’s not about the money, but I, she goes, please, I can’t tell. Your wife knows. So I said, okay, I’ll do it. So I come home, I tell my wife, I’m deejaying one last time, she says what you’re. You know why? Because this is gonna lead to another party and another and she’s just fine. You get to do a Dj one. So I get all my. Look at the date locked in. Dr Joe Turning 40. We’re going to the rooftop of the Mayo hotel. Look it up online to put on the show notes chimp, the Mayo Hotel. And a way I would do it is I would always devote as many hours preparing for the show as the actual show.
So if I dj for five hours, I would think for at least five hours about my playlist. So I made my playlist. It’s all handwritten. Every time, every show I obsessed I get to the show. And My strategy was this. I knew there was two other weddings occurring at the same time as your night. A strategy for every show. So my strategy was people from other weddings. A lot of times weddings get boring. Receptions get terrible because the djs terrible. I don’t care how good the food is, I don’t care how good the decor is. If entertainments bad people are going to go, I think our has to go where you have to leave. People just start ghost and yet 8:00 at the DJ’s bed so people would start wandering into the rooftop hotel. This is normal and I thought when they came in, I would invite them.
I’d say, Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Dr Joseph. 40th birthday. You are. Enter. You’re entering into the Dojo of Mojo, the Mecca of entertainment. Are you ready? And people were like, yeah, we are ready. So one by one they would just file a file and you’re fishing, you’re just throwing account folks. If you are here and you’re here from another wedding, you know where the party’s at. Text your friends and tell them, come on out, come on upstairs, come up to the roof top. Let’s make it. Let’s make it happen. Let’s make it epic. This guy is turning 40. He’s not getting married. No, it’s bigger than that. He’s turning 40.
So you know this party is supposed to end. It’s a private party. It starts off fun, quote unquote private private ends at midnight, so of course you know Dj Clay, we got to stay one more hour so you know, well you know, it’s 2:00, but what I failed to realize is that, you know, the, with the commotion that Clay’s bringing in and drawing the Cra, I mean it’s literally shoulder to shoulder.
This is where it gets crazy. This is where it gets crazy because I had this line. I kept saying, I wrote it down and I kept talking about this line that kept just guess like a commercial. I’m just hammering. I said, folks, you only turn 40 once, but some people get married twice. Come on, bring a friend. So people are bringing their friends up, up the people. I mean people are leaving weddings to come and I’m not exaggerating. The rooftop was designed to hold maybe 100 people maybe in. There is probably 300 people who are in there and all of them are. They’re not. I don’t know what’s happening. All I know is that your father in law says, listen, you can’t shut this down. My wife is texting me, you’re shutting this down, you have to come home because it’s like, I promised I’d be done at midnight.
It’s like one. And he goes, he’s paying me $100, not kidding, per song. He’s like, here’s $100. And I’m like, Oh yeah, no, no, no, no, no. And he’s like, 100 bucks. He’s and I’m like, Bill? No. And he goes $100 per song, you can buy your wife whatever. And Bill’s very conservative guy. He’s like, very, you can buy your wife whatever she wants. Just one more song, 100 bucks. He just keeps doing one and it was just one more. So then I’m like, let’s just one more. Yeah. And so we get the crowd, everyone’s got their hands in the air and they just don’t care. Everybody’s jumping around. We got people crowd surfing or we’ve got people flying drinks and I don’t know this, but there’s somebody on today’s show that was buying all of Tulsa drinks. Yes. So I’m making $100 per song. Meanwhile you’re spending $100 per minute buys the lakes for. I mean, can you explain what happened there because that was a pretty epic bar tab.
Um, well, you know, it was a private party till midnight and then it was opened to Tulsa. It’s open bar. Well, we forgot to shut the bar down at midnight, so I literally bought all of drinks, which I’m still paying for on that one. Take out a mortgage rather. I have a whole separate credit card billed on that one and I’m still paying down. But know what it was. Well worth it.
Here’s the problem. People at your party, we’re mentally present because smart phones didn’t exist yet. No. You had a phone and if you were at the place you were at the place mentally being this, this, Justin, this, Justin. This is an idea that maybe someone should. Marinade on. Present is a present with the present. He’s a present. People are not mentally present. Now, I would argue that the magic we created at your party could not happen again unless you told people to leave their smartphones somewhere because people were there mentally having a great time. They weren’t like people at concerts. Now bring their phone and film the whole concert. Yeah. They don’t watch the concert. You’re like, you just paid to stay home and watch it on tv, on your, uh, on a bigger screen to tell you. Let me tell you how I knew that we’d have lost a generation in large part how I knew it.
We were watching the super bowl. This would be, I think it was last year. You remember when timberlake performed? Yes. He goes into the stands and it’s to find a random person into basically sing the song with them in this kid doesn’t know how to interact and he keeps trying to get his phone out to get a selfie with timberlake rather than being with timberlake. Yup. Rather than just letting the TV cameras captured. He literally could not be with president. So timberlake’s trying to on national TV, trying to coach the kid to like, just embrace the moment, but the kid keeps trying to film the moment. So I want to get your. I want to tap into your mindset on this, this idea here, Dr Joe, because you, uh, you, you basically almost ruined my marriage as a result of having a Dj one more time. Uh, and then by the way, Dr Zellner said, hey, hey, hey.
He says, he calls me, says, Hey, tiger. Hey, tiger. Hey Tiger. I heard you’re a DJ it again. And I’m like, yes, you don’t lie to me. You did it again, didn’t you? I’m like, yes. He goes, well, bridget, I asked previously, bridget would like you to Dj her wedding and so I think you, it’s a golf club of Oklahoma and advance. I thank you in advance and we went ahead and booked the don’t worry carry will go in and get you paid and I’m excited to have you. And I’m like, Frick, people know I’m Dj. So I deejayed for his daughter’s wedding. And then I had so many friends that were at her wedding that we’re wanting me to Dj. I’m not kidding. I had to block people from my phone because I kept asking me to Dj for them. So now that you’ve, now that I’ve told you that was the, the, the, you, you kind of almost ruined my life. So I’m gonna ask you a tough question here. What is your take on smartphones and people being able to be mentally present or not being able to be mentally present now as a result of these smartphones? Oh Man. Yeah. I mean, back then, like I said,
I have it etched in my brain, but at the time there were, there were flip phones. So there were no freezers. Yeah, exactly. People playing snake and Motorola. So you had to flip this thing and that’s it. I mean there was no texting so there was no video. So yeah, that, that business coach party grew through dj clay organically or can all of you know, all of Tulsa just kinda came out and was being in the present moment. Not so much trying to capture and record the present moment. Therefore you’re not in the psychology today, they did a study called, is your smartphone making you dumb where it shows that people no longer have memories?
I would find that, yeah, because you’re trying to record the business coach memory, you know, I’ve gotten to the point now where, you know, I don’t, I don’t video or video or take pictures anymore, which is counterintuitive for Asians and so it’s a weird because um, you know, it was like growing up, I have like maybe six or seven pictures of me as an infant, you know, through the years and that kind of stuff. And um, I don’t need, I don’t need, you know, I don’t need pictures to remember things in the past or you know, you experienced how about a good, yeah. Experiencing or I can tell a good story to my children about the experience. So again, it’s, you know, when you, when you’re trying to capture anything you take away from those experiences and there’s no verbalization, but you’re right, people aren’t in the present moment.
Let’s take a selfie right now so I can remember my thing and then I’ll take a bet on my sale and then I’ll have thousands of videos of myself and I’m not, I don’t have the time to walk. They don’t go back online and watched the videos of myself and comment on the photos of myself and that’s what I’m gonna do with myself. No, just be present. I would encourage somebody take a fast. I encourage all the listeners fast from your smart phone for 24 hours. Just do it. Try it. Take 24 hours. I dare you. Turn your phone off. You won’t die. Let us know if something changes in your life. Yeah, it’s changed the game for so many people. That’s Dr Joe. It’s K l, Ortho Dot Com, k l Ortho.com. Without any further ado, we always end with a boom. Three, two, one.