A Thriver writes, “I want to read more. Clay, how do you find time to read when you work 60 + hrs week? And want to spend time with family?” – Randy
You have questions. America’s number one business coach has answers. It’s your brought up from Minnesota. Here’s another edition of ask clay. Anything on the thrive time business coach radio show?
yeah. See, remember the Koolaid guy that cuts you off? Like they cut you off there. We can say something. No when I was, but remember the Koolaid guy as a kid where he would say, Oh, you got the big, the big red jug dude. Try it one time. Did it make you feel good, Andrew? Just try one time. Oh, intercon brilliant. Andrew, do it. Do it now. Oh yeah. That’s so you know what I’m talking about something different. It’s a blast. He blasts to say oh. Oh yeah. Okay. I’m fired up about today’s show. Xavi apparently I’m so fired up. I cut you off. Were you gonna say that to my friend? Oh, I don’t recall something. Probably epic’s app [inaudible] probably the one I get probably life changing. Life giving. Well, day four of my coffee update. Still Sipping on the same nasty coffee. Just letting you know this thing is really got some flotation devices going.
Now. Get some growth. Oh yeah. That’s nice. Yeah, no. See now let’s say, what was the last time you actually took a sip of that? Oh, just spend to go seriously. It’s pretty rough. Oh my God. Okay. So here we’re talking today. We’re talking today. Oh, what? I’m just being real. I got this coffee from Jason, I believe it was Sunday. Yep. And today we’re recording this on a Tuesday. Just day three. That was a Saturday. You guys, cause you dropped off on Saturday, right? This could be this Saturday coffee. Nah, it was Jason. So this could be from Saturday,Z , Z. This, who am I to argue this could be you’re just fact checking here. This could be from Saturday. Don’t look at the question the driver asks. They ask clay, why are you sipping old coffee? No, that’s not the question. What they’re asking is they said, how do you find the time to read when working 60 plus hours per week?
No, but I’m going to do is I’m going to say, this is going to be a long answer. Please take notes. It’s very specific. I hope this helps you. And then Zeke and one up for me because he’s the one who taught me this one. Don’t let me Mr Thriver. Uh, Mr Randy in this case, don’t let me put my goals on you. Alright. Do not let me do that. Don’t, don’t do not compare yourself with me unless you want what I have. So I’m going to introduce you into what I have and then you can decide what you want. Um, much like Dr Zellner, uh, one of my businesses back in the day, epic photography, one of my businesses back in the day, DJ connection and one of my businesses now elephant in the room, there’s a market out there as where I could just keep opening more stores. Correct. But I don’t want to. And previous to having a man cave discussion with you probably go back almost five years. We sitting down and I said, gee, why didn’t you open up another optometry clinic? You have to, you know, why didn’t you expand to other states and you, I mean, it’s been a long time, but roughly what’s your reason for not opening up more than just the two optometry clinics? Which are very busy by the way.
My children were young and I didn’t want some body else raising them. And so I knew in order in order to be in their lives, you have to be in the house. And if I’m in some other state opening up an office, which takes time and for sure which I could have done. Right. And so what I did then as I said, I wanted to grow my footprint. So I thought well I’ll just do other businesses within Tulsa, therefore I’m not traveling and I can be there and be be dad. Cause that was a very, to me that was, that was very important
at the time. I thought cause lot of [inaudible] we say this, a lot of men, I’m sure there’s women that say this too, but a lot of me, I see a ton of men say this, they say I’m doing it for my family. No you’re not. You’re probably doing it the first 50 grand of the year for your family. Now it’s just a game for you. Sure. That’s mine. That’s, I mean maybe you are Mr Randy. Maybe you are. I’m just saying for me, I wasn’t, I’m saying it’s like a game, right? It kind of fun. It’s fun. So I’m just saying, I couldn’t say, well, I’m doing this for Vanessa. I did say that I thought it, but when upon further review, it wasn’t about the money. You know, when you see when you can pay for the House multiple times, you don’t worry about your bills, you can be done.
I mean, I’m giving you an empower anybody out there to say, you know what, I’m cool. I can make 100,000 a year. I’m moving on shirt and I have a, a dentist client I worked with years ago. I remember this. We had a great meeting. His business had almost doubled in size and less than a year. This is close to a decade ago. And he says, clay, I’ve decided I want to play tennis with my wife. Uh, during the week. We love tennis. That’s when we having met kind of dating. We played tennis and I’m like, okay. He goes, so I’m gonna move actually to a smaller office. This lease is about ready to expire, smaller office. I’m only going to see patients, you know, three days a week, maybe two, and I’m going to be semi retired. And I’m like, doc, you’re like 35, 36. He’s like I can’t no it’s just me and two, two assistants and that’s all I need.
Now I’m good, I’m good. I’ve earned, I’ve earned, I’ve earned, I’m ready, I’m ready to just, I’m going. Wow. But at the time in my my short sidedness I’d ever said this to him, I just thought it driving back to the office. I thought, man, that guy’s thrown away a lot of money here. Geez. He’s, what’s he doing? So again, I like to read books. I like to read books. I’ll tell you why. Why I like to read books. Uh, the, the curiosity, the pursuit of knowledge. Like right now I’m reading a book, I can’t mention the name of the book right now cause I’ve been asked to read this book and I don’t like this book right now, but I like the way the book is written. How sick is that? Sick bed. Can you read this book and break it down?
Cause I need your, I need you, I need you to understand how this book was written. It’ll help you in this particular area of your life. And I’m going, okay, bought the book. I hate the book, hate the book. I love the way it’s written. And I told John’s, we’re not working out. No sense. We’re working out this one. I said, Jonathan to formula the formulas. They are the authors, building rapport with the audience. They establish a need, they deliver benefits, they go for the closing. As much as I hate the topic, I like the book. Well, I could see that. So I kind of liked the mechanics of it. I don’t even like baseball the sport, but I love the stadium. I love going to the old stadiums and seeing Wrigley field and how it’s constructed. I’m kind of sick that way about books.
But I think business people, if we’re not careful, we start to go, well, I’ve read a thousand books. Well I promise. So let’s, let’s, let’s, let’s, let’s go to, you told me this man cave probably five years ago you said, I said, see what kind of books you read. You go like a lot of fiction. And I’m like, well, we have what? Business Book? What case studies are you read? What are you reading? He didn’t take it. Then the Batman Man Cave z. What book are you reading? Thinking I’m about to get down to that lower, you know Andrew, when you get down to that real man tug of z, what book are you reading? He was like better than me. And then I remember you saying like, ah, game of Thrones or something like that. Oh yeah. I’m like, you’re reading game of Thrones. What Pittsburgh business principles could you possibly get at us?
Is it a rape and pillage? Exactly. Can you explain to me the kind of business books you read now? What kind of business books do you now read z or do you read business books and then what kind of books do you read? I read, I mostly read fantasy or fiction. I mean, I like to be entertained when I’m reading. I at this point in my life, um, you know, I’m not sitting out there trying to figure out, you know, oh my God, have a check. I know we’d have a checklist, but I’m not going to read, you know, checklist manifesto, manifesto. You already read, you’ve already read the 1990s version of that, right? When you were learning every used to run them up. That little a to do list. Yes. Read, write in nine point font. Oh yes we are. We’ll post it notes.
Right? Where are those now? Oh, somewhere in the landfill. Because you’re done with it. Right? I’m done with it. I love what you talked about the other day. A gentleman that you highly valued and he said his, his philosophy of life was one to 25. You do your learning, 25 to 50. You do your earning. Yup. And 50 plus you do your returning. I love that. So let me wrap it up there. Randy. Here you asked the question, well, how do I find time to read, uh, when working 60 plus hours per week. NowZ , this is a self-serving recommendation for Randy. Okay? It’s going to seem like it’s coming from a sincere place and maybe you can help fix it. Okay. I read all the books behind me and condensed them into a book called start here, right? So everybody would only have to get one book and if they would just implement that.
I get so many people that say implementing. I had one guy, he’s a doctor on the west coast. He said, after reading that book, I realized I don’t need to ever read another business book again. I just need to implement all the action steps in that book. It’s rich. That’s what we wrote that thing, right? So I would say, I mean, I’m going to make like $3 and you buy the book too, by the way. That’s how it works. And for authors. Okay, so kit, the start here, book I, you’re just bragging or get the boom book, which is the magazine version and implement everything in there. But see, isn’t there a certain time where you have to just stop reading all these books? Well, yes, you gotta, you’ve gotta go into action. I mean learning, I have put a high, high value on learning and that’s one of the reasons why we did our business school without the BS. That’s what got this whole thing started, right? Is Trying to mentor millions
in entrepreneurship. And so I think there’s some point you go, okay, now put down the book and pick up the shovel and let’s get it. Let’s go, let’s go. Well, whatever your, whatever your tool is you’re going to have for your business. Um, but I think that breeding and always kind of learning some more. I think that’s a good thing. I agree. And, and, and I would say instead of watching the new Netflix series that’s come out, pick up a book, pick up a book. And if you don’t like reading, get the books on tape. So think about this. Step one, define your goals. We got that established. Yes, but don’t let us put our goals on you. Don’t, don’t let us be an aunt Connie to you. Step two, don’t read books just to read books. Do you remember my aunt Connie? Remember that story?
Well, here’s the deal. Every time I hear about Trent, Connie, it touches me in a way that was deeper than the previous time. Yeah, just put the dagger all the way in. Just share it. Cause I think, I think Randy, Brian doesn’t know the story well Randy, let me tell you the story about my aunt Kanya. It’s my mother’s older sister. She’s past guys breast, God rest for beautiful, beautiful lady. No, she’s dead years ago. For those of you who don’t know, and I’m like, you’re new to the show or something, but I’m an optometrist, which is kind of like, oh, kind of like a dentist is. In other words, I go to school specifically for the eyes and everything I do is for the eyes, just like a dentist for the teeth. You know. Now an ophthalmologist is a physician that is an MD or d o that can do whatever.
And then they specialized in eye surgery and eye stuff. And then an optician is like a pharmacist. They fill the prescription. So you have the optician, like a pharmacist filling prescription. You have the dent, you have an optometrist like a dentist, and then you have the ophthalmologist. Repeat it one more time. I want to get it. So there’s a days ophthalmologist, they went through medical school. Got It. Okay. And then they specialized in eyes. Okay. Then there’s the optometrist and our school was all about the eyes. Okay. And then you have the, um, and then you have the opticians, which are like a pharmacist. They, they’re in the lab, they’re grinding the lenses, you know. And what would, um, what does an octomom that’s a mom with eight legs, I think. I don’t know. Almost eight kids. A kid. Okay. Back to you sir. October.
I mean, you heard about the optician that backed up into when the lens grinders? No, I didn’t expect to call themself. So it’s hard to say. Let me, Oh, I have to quit. No, that was just real quick. Let me just hit this. I just, this I feel, Oh Bailey. So good. So give me a hit. When I was younger and we’d be at a family reunion, that was one. That’s how your aunts and uncles always sized you up. Right? So what are you going to do and what do you do? What are you gonna do in life? That was the big question. What are you going to be when you grow up? What are you going?
What are you going to be when you grow up, Robert? But you’ve got so much potential. You’re wasting your potential. Looking at the human eye all the time. It’s crazy.
I don’t remember what type. I don’t know why. I just thought it’d be kind of cool. I was pretty young at the time with that. We, I think I want to be maybe a cardiologist that seems cool. Done it. Cause you know, Great Robyn. Being a doctor to seeing Mac to surefire guaranteed way that I wouldn’t grow up the way that I did. Very poor at that. Well, you can die. That was he a doctor there never walking. I mean they’re got a nice car, right? And Nice House and always seems like
they got a job. You would not be an idiot. [inaudible] good blades. You’re going to be a cardiologist and not an optometrist. So years later, fashion
flash forward, um, I, uh, we had another, you know, thanksgiving or whatever. And so she corners me in,
drop it. What are you going to do with yourself? She says to me, I’d been an optometrist now for several years. My business was growing. I mean, that was kind of, kind of a fun time of my life. I was, I mean, I was loving it
and I loved the lifestyle that I had and I, you know, I thought about it hard and fast, you know, but optometry, about half business and half doctrine, you know, when people aren’t coming in sick and dying on, you know, they’re coming in, you make their vision better.
Tell me something. Yeah, please don’t get off way over there. Die On me. Don’t try. Yes.
And she cornered me up and she just, she just read me the ride. She says, I am so disappointed in you. And she goes, all the potential you had and you just became an optometrist, you could have. And she was just going on and on and on and on and on. You’ll just have disappointed she was in me and that, you know, for her, I was supposed to be doing something much different. Right? She had bigger goals for me. She had bigger stuff for me and she just knew I was going to do bigger things and I, I let her talk and I, and I said, well, I ain’t Connie, you’re able to have your opinion, but I want you to know one thing right now. I am very happy with my life and my lifestyle and here are the reasons why I’m very happy with the choices that I’ve made. And I really don’t appreciate, you know, you thinking that since I didn’t do your goals, that you’re that disappointed in me. Why don’t you just enjoy the success I’m having and celebrate that and now
don’t worry about break. Good Times. C’Mon break. Good time. Point Robin. I love that jam.
And then she, she kind of stunned, you know, she was kind of quiet. She goes, well, I’ll give them your, your [inaudible] didn’t, she was kind of like, you’re probably right.
You’re probably right, Robert. And then, uh, we never, we never had that conversation ever again. There it is. There it is. So Mr Randy, step one, define your goals. Make sure that you’re, they are your goals, not aunt Connie’s goals. Make sure that they are your goals too. Don’t read books just to read books. I’m just pumped. Being a pastor I worked with years ago, he’s written all these books about the Bible. You know, does he have books about the Bible? And he’s like, I’m just saying, I’m having a hard time keeping up clay here. You’re reading all the time. It’s like, I should be really reading. I go, there’s one book I’d probably want to just dominate that right one book for what you do. You know? So a lot of times in your industry, you only need to have like one or two really good books that you dominate.
Now the third, the third thing here is you need to sit down. I’m a, so I’m assuming it sounds like you’re a married guy. I’d sit down with you wife and uh, determine the boundaries, which with w w that she’s okay with determine the boundaries. So as an example for me,Z , I’m allowed to start work at 3:00 AM there you go. I’m allowed to so I can go to bed at night, get up at three. That’s my, that’s six hours I’m allowed to do that. I’m not allowed to get up at one in the morning anymore. No, no, no, no. I don’t get in trouble. It’s like, oh, you’re a crown. It’s more of like, I feel horrible the next day. I look like death that I want to go to bed early and then she’ll say something, you know, really correct. Like, you know, wait a deal.
If you go to bed, you know, if you get up at one in the morning and you go to bed at seven, you’re not actually a dad. You just slept in the house where they live. Ooh. Oh, truth bombs. They need that Randy, like every years or reset. Yeah, you will reset. But seriously, I go to bed at nine, wake up at three. That’s our boundaries. Weekends and with the Kiddos, I can work up until 10 in the morning. Uh, you know, on a Saturday I can do that. Um, you know, I can, it doesn’t bother anybody. The kids don’t really miss me cause they’re upstairs doing whatever. But Z, once you get into that family time, once you’re down here and working on your turn off your phone, working on your stuff, making that last sales call at 10 o’clock at night, it doesn’t go well.
It doesn’t go well. So define that boundary cause it’s, see that’s a, that’s a, you gotta you gotta give him the same page. Yeah. And make sure we’re just putting time with your family. Like clay just said, make sure it’s quality time. You’re not sitting there looking at your phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You keep trying to tell you about their baseball game for the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you’re there, you’re present. Put the laptops away, the iPads away. Put all the screens away and be present now a z Jonathan Kelly, I know he has a question. He wants to ask you about this. He just doesn’t know it yet. So I’m just going to thank him in advance. He’s over there taking show notes but we’re going to see, we can call on them and to get on this microphone cause I have a question.
I know that he wants to ask or that maybe someone else in his situation wants to ask it but he just knows it. I just, I want to ask on behalf of the Jonathan Kelly’s of the world. So he, I don’t think he’s making his way over here. I don’t think anything is okay. This be passive-aggressive ordering his Brown’s apparel right now. Get ready to cheer for he switched teams. He was a giant fan for a long time and now he’s decided that he’s now the die. The giants are dead to him and he switched to become a Cleveland Brown fan. Jonathan Kelly, when did you decide to make the switch? Oh dear. Up. Muted again. There you passive aggressive. This A, I’ve actually, I’ve never been a giants fan. I have no idea what you’re talking about. Okay. So what did you decide to become a browns fan?
A lifelong browns fan. Okay, nice. Nice. So here, here, here’s the question. Jonathan is a guy with, um, a young baby. I call babies sleep sucking demons. I mean babies. So Jonathan Kelly, how about how many minutes per night does your baby sleep? Um, she will sleep on average. Um, it’s like three hours a day. Now. Z when you were a father of babies? Yes. What did it look like at home for you? Did your wife raised the Kiddos and did you go to work? I’m not asking you. I’m saying that that’s the correct move. There’s just somebody out there that wants to know how that happened. Did you, did you go to work? Did she stay home? Did you help put baby down? What? Tell, tell me what your, when I was at the house, I helped with all the baby chores. I changed a lot of diapers. I, you know, I, I, uh, here’s a little life
hack for anybody listening out. There we go. Who’s getting ready to have children? Here we go. Or you have an infant. I highly, highly, strongly, strongly encourage you to have your wife or significant other delayed the mother of your child. Learn how to breastfeed because then when my kids are awake in the middle of the night hungry, I’d be like, well, I know what they need. I can’t, I mean,
did you try if you know they have emissions now for that? Oh No, no. I dragged something on. It’s like a whole thing. I did do a life hack
with my daughter when she was a baby, so my wife would get up and, and uh, there’s a thing where they pump, you know, to the compound
Pompa da pump, pump, pump it, dog can’t, we were talking about this, but she knew it would go here eventually. She, uh, she had a job right there at the end of my optometrist.
Oh. So she kept it until we, we moved to Tulsa. And so she would go from eight to noon and come home and take care of, take care of little Bridget, and then she’d go from one to five. And so I had those, those two windows. I would be with Bridgette all by myself. And so, you know, she’d have to pump so that I could plop. And so we would lay there, we would lay there at bed and she’d wake up and I would do is I take my little Pinky, my little pink here, and I’d kind of roll it up like this and it’s almost kind of nipple ask and I would, I would put that in her mouth.
I can tell you this, you’re born in the world with more nibbly pinkies I’ve ever seen. Thank you very much. I’d agree with that.
Bobby. It bought me every morning, 30 more minutes of sleep. But then, but it only works one time. Then she’d wake us up and we’d go back to sleep and then 30 minutes later she’d wake,
no, that wasn’t it. You tricked me the first time. She was like, oh no, I’m not going for the fake. What questions would you have? Maybe not, maybe not even once you have it on behalf of guys like you, you know, guys with young families raising babies, getting, you know, young dads. Cause I think there’s somebody out to the, has a young baby, young kid, young dad. They have this fear of missing out on their child. Walking for the first time or whatever they’re doing. And so they’re not able to fully devote themselves to the business. And so it never really takes off. Or what do you have to give you questions there on behalf of the thrive nation? Anything, any observations on behalf of thrive nation? Any just feedback as being a young dad? Uh, well, I mean, uh, this is probably common sense.
Uh, or at least it should be, but I would not recommend having a child, uh, you know, without planning it. There we go. Whoa, that’s a tip. A, B, a solid tip, you know. Uh, no, I’m, you know, Stephanie, my wife, uh, she does a phenomenal job. She does, uh, most of the, uh, taking care of Harper is our, uh, daughter’s name. And so she’s a champ. But you know, women are definitely the stronger sex in that regard where that she takes care of her every single night. And so I could not do it by myself. Like I know that, like I, if I were a single dad, like I would just run in the river and just go hide and quicksand or something. And you could do it. I don’t know j
k you could get it done. Trust me, it’s not, it’s
not rocket science. I mean it’s coming. You know when I cry, there’s three things, you know. Three things. Three things. The pinky, they’re hot. You’re hungry. They’re uncomfortable down downstairs. Cause that just did a little math to break it a little bit in this time. Yeah. Or, or what’s the third thing? What could it be? Clean area. It irritated about global warming and that’s that. She’s [inaudible]. I would just say this though. Seriously, if you’re out there today and you’re going, Gosh, how do you find time? My final tip is say no to everything that’s not on your list. If it’s not just a burning need, if it’s not a, you’ll die. If you don’t do it, let me just say no. So John, what kind of crap are you saying no to now? Because you are a committed dad. Committed husband. Business Guy. Yeah, I mean of Stephanie.
I don’t really go out. So we have a weekly date night. Uh, but that’s it. You know, so we’re not going out to the bars and doing things like that. Um, I don’t remember the last TV show I watched. Um, I, you know, I’m just very intentional so I’m either at work or I’m at home with my family. It’s, it’s one of those two things and that’s, that’s what I do. I just think there’s, there’s, there’s this idea’s z that what we can do is, is not say no to things and then have big success. There’s this idea out there on youtube. It’s a shame. It’s a shame and think about it. It’s, I think particularly here in the Midwest, we’re brought up to be nice and nice, has always good, nice wins the day, continue to be nice, good job. But you can also, you can also be accurate.
And if you don’t want to do something, you don’t have to make up an excuse. You know, you tell somebody, I don’t want to do that, I’m not going to do that. And you may think that sounds me. You may take the long run. It’s actually nicer. Your, they say if you’re breaking up with somebody, they’d rather the person be told that even though it hurt, then you ghosting them. You follow me? So if you’re in the midst of a breakup, by the way, just as a sidebar here, little extra bonus, extra bonus, general break. Don’t just go. Somebody tell them, say, hey listen, it’s just not working out. I’m moving on without Ya. Have a nice life. Can I, and then play a deal over and over and over. [inaudible] breakup, tip and breastfeeding tip [inaudible] a pile on bonus tips and there’s somebody out there listening who’s going to go, you guys are giving me conflicting information.
Let me explain this. If Dr z fire somebody or someone, his team does, if they have to do, they don’t want to do that. But if they do, it’s very clear as to why they’re fired. But then if a person keeps calling over and over and over to want to talk about it, that’s when you say blocking yet, right? Correct. After you’ve clearly verbally fired it. Yeah. Boom. And I don’t even want to tell him why I’m five. You know what, I don’t even want to waste my time telling someone why I’m putting your tail on face that I tell them they’re gone. It’s not working out. And you need to go. Bye Bye now. Bye Bye. Bye Bye. So rolling customer. Hopefully that answers your question. If you have any other questions, do not hesitate to email us info at thrive time. show.com it’s info at thrive time, show.com nosy.
We have a business conferences coming up here in June and I’m so excited. I think the June conference might be a, the the the thunder show. It’s going to be rowdy and it’s going to be a, um, very heavily attended. A lot of neat folks will be there. The date I’m pulling it up right now on the calendar here. Do we have the date? Seventh and eighth? Yeah, it’s a, it’s in June 7th and eighth. G It’s going to be hosted at the Thunderdome, Aka the thrive time show world headquarters. And uh, Zohan I think that uh, this one, if you, if you attend, I think it might just blow your mind.
I’ll tell you what, it’s so fun to hear the stories after a business conference and the life changing Mojo that happens at the business conferences. And uh, you know, it’s, it’s really kinda cool. And, and what’s really fun too is that you’ll see someone will be like, I guess it’s my third business conference come to. And every time I pick up something, I pick up a new nugget.
I know the Canadians are going to be here. I believe we have it.
I believe anybody from South Korea yet, cause they download our podcasts so much.
Did we have a Canadians? I didn’t have Australia. I don’t think we have a South Korean coming. We have someone from Guam, a z. If you look here and now, today we have 2,651 five star reviews, 2,651 five stores. So we’re starting to pick up some momentum, some cheese, some energy, some Mojo. Uh, if you don’t believe the, uh, the hype, please, uh, go to youtube and type in thrive time. Show reviews or just search on Google thrive time show reviews. You can read the reviews right there. And if you want to earn free tickets to an in person business conferences or as close to free as we can do a, simply leave us a review on iTunes or on Google and sit as a screenshot of that to [email protected] Send us a screenshot with your information to info at thrive time, show.com and we will make sure we take care of your tickets for the low low price of $37. See, is that possible? Well, it is. It’s possible. And so now z, without any further ado, we’re gonna wrap up today’s show. Uh, Johnny, are you ready to go? You’re ready to during the boom. I’m feeling it. Andrew, are you psychologically prepared? Absolutely. Okay. Z, you ready? Here we go. Three, two, one go.
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