The Art of Controlling Conversations

Show Notes

Clay Clark breaks down the art of controlling conversations with leading questions and the importance of preparation if your goal is to truly become a source of wisdom.

Mindset #9 – The person who is asking questions is in control of the conversation.

NOTABLE QUOTABLE – “You don’t need a big close as many sales reps believe. You risk losing your customer when you save all the good stuff to the end. Keep the customer actively involved throughout the presentation and watch your results improve.” – Harvey Mackay (New York Times best-selling author and iconic sales trainer)

Mindset #10 – You will fall to the level of preparation, the notion that you will rise to the occasion is false. Those who fail to prepare will lose.

NOTABLE QUOTABLE – “My personal coaching philosophy, my mentality, has always been to make things as difficult as possible for players in practice, however bad we can make them, I make them.” – Bill Belichick (Legendary NFL football coach of the New England Patriots)

Business Coach | Ask Clay & Z Anything

Audio Transcription

Anything specific on your best business coach radio and today we’re continuing with the series of how to become the elephant in the room and any room and think about it. I can just think about what it means to be the elephant in the room. The room is the thing that everybody knows about, but nobody talks about it so is example, kind of funny, but true recently, steve currington he’s the detoxes on mortgage lender right away, if you’re, if you’re listening right now and the rates are only going to be going up because eventually going to have to curb inflation right, let me see if I got on there yeah it’s happening right now. Eventually, the rates will have to go up to stop inflation because member you can keep interest rates low, but is a consequence of doing that. The value of money goes down over time. Thus, the government to end inflation were to decrease inflation of it. You have to raise interest rates so have they began to reality, begun to raise the rate at which they raised the rates. So far as an example, a gentleman who started building a house I want to see was like september of 17 is closing like next week right and he’s getting a rate that is almost a half a point higher than he would have got if he closed in september, so it’s extra month is it cost that person in his case it’s 16 bucks. He is a $216,000 loan, so in this case it’s $16 for every 8th of the point, so you got $64 at half point of his payment.

That goes up, which is it extra $64 a month, * 30 years, a real thing, I mean if you multiply 8 * 12.0 weeks, I mean he’s paying an extra that be what you said:$16 okay, so 16 by *, 12 he’s going to pay $192 a year, and you multiply that times. 30 years, that’s a $5,760 increase to be paying throughout the life of the loan which isn’t going to kill him he’s a great income and it’s you know he can’t afford it. Isn’t that it’s just the point and I talked to him yesterday about this in here, so we’re getting right now, a lot of people are complaining because there’s going to be there at leadership position at total lending concepts. By the way you want to get pre-qualified go to steve currington. Com, but he is not the president united states charge of the best business coach printing press for the united states government. By want to make sure you get this idea. Steve is decided to park his lamborghini inside the riverwalk office. It’s where they’re very secure. We have a great the riverwalk folks have great security bill and the team they’re great people, and we got cameras everywhere. So it’s nice and safe there, but you have a lamborghini parked lamborghini. Do you have? This was a 2017 lamborghini, huracan lamborghini, huracan, okay and lamborghini huracan, and if you were, if you were to buy one of those, you know i, don’t even know what it would cost I’m going to autotrader right now, it’s showing right now that I can get one right now, if I want to for about $279,000 and i, get a discount at the mileage on it to 79 so park in the office that we put it inside.

So it’s hilarious because you’re talking to a client and you’re here, I’m going in between meetings and I’m, not exaggerating a client will pull me twice today. They’re, like lamborghini in your heart. It’s not even like i, didn’t bring it up and send it to something like did you get the elephant in the room is:is there is a lamborghini lamborghini in the room? Is there is a lamborghini in the room in that damn well that blends into because it’s everday mantises the color, which means it’s like kind of like a really like beautiful darkish green switch, doesn’t blend it actually kind of get into the conversations will say. Are you aware? No i? Just noticed the elephant in the room, men’s grooming, lounge, called elephant in the room and for all of our listeners and on listeners it go to the tulsa area, will be franchising soon and if you want to, you know, find a way to earn potentially an extra 10 to $12,000 a month passively. You should check into that learn more about best business coach franchising, I’ll, be franchising here in the next, probably 3 to 4 months or more a t. I t ourlounge.Com. You can also schedule your first haircut for for a dollar there for all the lizards, it’s a dollar, but it’s like a country club meets men’s hair, so you’re getting a haircut right now and you realize that your haircut experience is not world class. If you go, you know what every time I go into a room. People say if you look at someone and they go so what’s going on with that, because you know I mystery shop around town I go to all the different hair places to get my haircut, which is why you have no hair left on your head. Will the new the new the new place I went to recently? They did a good job. Is fine job, but I want to blow the competition, but they did a fine job. But if I go to 12 places to get my haircut a year, I should I get my haircut like once every two weeks you know just so I can make sure I get mystery shop the competition enough.

Typically, one out of five haircuts is acceptable, but are rough right, I mean too bad. That’s why I wear a hat all the time, but here’s the thing I just want to get this. The elephant in the room be the elephant in the room, because you are the wisest person in the room. People turn to you as a source of wisdom and i. Remember. This I was probably 24, 25 and I thought about what would it be like to be wise, cuz, i? Don’t money I made a bill of the company i? Can cash producing machine with dj connection.Com I had really created a great business for myself, but I wasn’t I wouldn’t say:i was a source of wisdom and I thought to myself. What would that look like if I was actually a source of wisdom? I know what you would look like dr., z, exactly disc, jockey steve, you know what people would do when they found out that I was a disc jockey. We would go to like some nice party that we got invited to a new connections in the best business coach owner of the company would have a party at the house where they were serving wasel, expensive, porcelain, dinnerware. You know when they’ve done and they would invite you over to have multiple forks. So if you sit down for up for a progressive dinner with multiple, you know, courses, steve, there’s, multiple, forks and I wasn’t sure which light is 1 cold seriously. You need to wear a suit and tie to work, but you don’t have social studies in like wearing a hoodie or something and I’ll bet you’re going to need to dress up so we’re going to like the summit club or the polo grill or nice places, I’ve been invited to and I’m like 26 27 and dude I have no clue how life works with the outside silverware and where what, where and work your way to the middle but I can’t listen to it. Wasn’t today and you’ve made some good money, but you want to become a source of wisdom. This show is for you for breaking down the 57 words of wisdom in mindsets. You need to become an elephant in any room. So here’s my exit, number 9.

The person, who’s asking the questions is in control of the conversation asking questions is in control the conversation somebody should write that down and chill out with a friend of yours, because the person who’s asking the question she see, that is, the person who’s in control, the conversation to harvey mackay. This is the new york times bestselling, author iconic sales trainer. He wrote a book called swimming with the sharks. Do the harvey mackay start off selling envelopes like the mackay mackay, but yeah the mackay 66 cuz? He would collect 66 things about all of his customers and it you think what you sell envelopes, dude, I’m, a white like even know their way was so good at selling envelopes and result of asking his 66 questions about. He wanted to know everything there is to know about the end. Then one day, these guys a true story. They were customers of his and they were best business coach members of a local country club in minneapolis minnesota. They pull them aside and said. Here’s the deal we think you’re, like the man like we watch you, you saw the envelopes right now, thinking about buying a envelope company. We want to make you the head of the company. Now there’s rumor out there that he’s the one who set up the meeting rumor has it that they set up the meeting either way doesn’t matter the point:is they invested millions of dollars into him? They bought an envelope company and the rest is history I’m he just did he was. He is one of the guys who helped the convince minnesota they needed to build the metrodome for the vikings and the twins and he’s kind of a big deal there.

He says the person who’s asking questions is in control. The conversation goes on to say, you don’t need a big clothes as many sales reps believe you risked losing your customer when you save all your good stuff to the end, keep the customer actively involved throughout the presentation and watch your results. Improve so still want to ask you this, because you throughout your career, have sold unbelievable number of mortgages. I mean many more than most people sell their entire career, yeah, you’ve done in minnesota and in texas that will close typically like one loan a month. What I mean this is. This is typical. What’s the biggest month you’ve ever had for selling mortgages, the number I sold a mortgage is I mean the most I’ve ever sold them on for hugo. Okay, that that right there I mean we were at the peak of the economic boom or whatever was going on. What’s the most mortgages that you’ve sold in a month will, as a company like with dlc like last month, which is a winter month, we set a record for a company not without a big company, believe in some decent producers. But you know between probably 7 or 8 top best business coach producers. Do we had 76 unit 76 homes that you financed when in february, which is a short month, and it’s like our lowest month of the year, and so it is spring yellow, do hundred 50 this year, yeah, we will I mean it’s just and we’re just continue to grow. So I just wanna make sure the listeners understand that you know what you’re talking about right so 76 in a winter month and listen the other thing to point out Here:i’m small potatoes, you know, there’s like another guy who just murders me in the volume that he does right because they’re so there’s always somebody you talk about the elephant, the room in the wise person in the room right.

There’s always somebody that’s going to like do more out, so that, and that’s where I get my drive from is I want to be that guy. So I’m constantly trying to outdo myself and there was a driver’s a little tail, a little best business coach story about a guy who I’m not going to share his name. So I think the story is indicative of this point of the person who’s asking the questions is in control. The conversation not going to say the molten, the morality of how he got paid it is, is the way that I would endorse. But steve you like the story. Okay, he did. Software like he was very good at writing code. So one day he goes to his boss and his boss. When you pay me pay me like for the results for the hours and the boss, what was his results and he’s? Okay, so you wouldn’t mind if I deliver the results and I work from home. Is that cool? If the results in texas are better I mean if I deliver results, 5% better could I ride home vermont in the boss says. Well, you know I have to think about it, cause I’m back. Okay, here’s the deal! I need you to come to our weekly meeting, so I can see your face, but then yeah you can work them out. I’m going to have somebody else. Do my job and I’ve done this pitch now with like i, actually am full time employed and four companies he’s done. This would like for couple of companies where he’s got the okay to work for the next appointment, so you mean you have foil, yeah I have one meeting on like monday at like 8 or I check in tuesday date, wednesday at 8, so I’m actually making a $10,000 a month, salary for four different companies and I said:do you do any of the coating? He says? Absolutely, not my house I travel and that’s what you can do when you know how to influence people learn how to ask those questions.

They just drive time show on your radio, were talking about how to become a source of wisdom, get ready to add her that thrive time show on talk. Radio 1170 broadcasting live from the center of the universe. It’s business school without the bs featuring optometrist turned entrepreneur, dr. Robert zoellner, with ussba of the year clay, clark clark, and today we’re talking about how you can become the elephant in any room and for those of you just tuning in i, want to give you a visual example, as well as an example of what this means in the game of best business coach life. But in our offices were located, the riverwalk in beautiful jenks, america right next to the flying tea. So it’s about 20,000 square foot facility and steve I mean there’s entrepreneurial art. There’s words of encouragement. There’s many many of coders web developers. Graphic designers I mean it’s a thriving metropolis of entrepreneurship it it’s it’s laid out to look like bloomberg, but the people who work with me don’t know that because they’ve never been to bloomberg but I have been to bloomberg and it’s designed to look like bloomberg. There’s a gong there’s a gone. We close deals. I ring the gong like 8 times today, everytime that an elephant elephant room get to lead. You hear a sound, only comes in. It’s it’s worth the trip to tulsa just to see the office working and we have multiple doctors on I built, 13 multimillion-dollar companies. Until it’s kinda like the back and nerve center for these businesses, you can see them operating the wheel of marketing all the graphic design on the print piece of the video ography, the photography and it’s all happening right. There’s a coffee bar 20, but today steve moved in his back.

He moved in his neon green lamborghini into the facility and I took studio answer. You might have to just unplug that best business coach phone, because that is my outbound call only and see if you just unplug the ethernet on the back of that thing, that’s the best way to shut that thing off, but that’s my took the back front of the commissioner gordon phone. No one knows that now that’s hilarious, but here’s the thing red neon, green lamborghini. You moved it into our office, so I had 2 clients that pulled me aside. It’s hilarious to go i! Don’t know if you’re aware of this, but there’s a lamborghini in your car. Doing here know that I’m extremely focused and took me to realize that I don’t typically pick up on things that I’m not focused on there like 8 i, don’t know if you know this, but there’s a lamborghini or have you moved it? It’s an adult and I said yeah I did steve kerr park in the car. That steve is it kind of gets the looks you getting out. You park your car in the office. What does super move I did today as I got there extra early, you know usually get there about 5:30 or so, but I got like 445 4:30 and I was just me and john and devin, and so I turned it around, because it was facing like to the to the south of a turnaround word spacing out so that when I shoot my podcast, you can see the hood, and it was just look that writes better to the thing today was like how many people going to notice that the lamborghini is now turn around right. As yesterday, it was facing the way in and i, don’t know how many people notice, but it was really cool clay and i, don’t know if you were in there when I pulled it in for the first time, yep the entire off everyone I’m in the car and I can just see, and this is by the way every time I drive this car.

So it’s not abnormal for me, but I’m pulling up in every single person that works at fry from the coders to web developers. Graphic designers, the elephant room call center people all have their their cell phones out taking pictures, video snapchat everything whatever, because they tasted like there’s a lamborghini pulling into the office right now, and so what’s not normal. If we’re talking about today is being a source of wisdom, it’s where you know more than everybody in the room and i. Remember at the age of 26, I didn’t tell anybody. I didn’t tell my wife this. My prayer at the time and I was still struggling. Struggling with my face. I was before my son was born blind and subsequent healed, and so I wasn’t really a christian buy new of the christ relationship that I knew of that, and so what I would do is I can’t have you like kind of weak prayers? Let me drive and I’m like god. If you’re listening make me a source of wisdom, I I have built the multimillion-dollar dj company I coming up dj connection.Com. We were doing like 80 wedding so weekend, like four thousand a year. That thing was printed money, I mean we made a hundred and sixty seven bucks per wedding. So just to give you some some math on that $267 and its we do 80 a weekend $80,360 every week. You know, and it was just straight profit, and so it was a really good place to be I mean just so you’re listening, that’s like you know. $600,000 a year for tography company in india, just was taken off before going great. I was winning charlie, sheen and i. Just put on my put people every time. I would tell somebody they say:what do you do for a living I’m, a disc, jockey right there like this guy’s? Probably retarded people start talking to you, but they also say:hey man. Can you can you play a what’s your favorite best business coach playlist? What will happen is immediately go into a speaker conversation with half the population. What’s your favorite kind of ant bro, what kind of speakers and then the next question would happen. It’s almost like when you talk it’s funny. When you watch an american to travel to mexico, they don’t know how to speak spanish, and so, when you go to those resorts, they typically will talk to people louder. Do i, don’t understand them, so they know where the bathroom is in the person like me, amor, no, no hablo, english and then go.

Do you know where the bathroom is that you talking louder than not seeing an english doesn’t matter right and they still don’t understand until you’re, like listen man I’m at your resort in their country, though, and it’s just funny that this thing I’ve noticed every time. So people would start to talk to me like I’m, retarded they’re, like so in what I would call accounting one of the things we do is we try to create a pro forma, a performa. You know and there’s a thing we focus on and I know if you’re aware of, but it’s called eva. And I’m, like random name with me, like I’m, an idiot i, don’t feel like that. You’re, like a plumber, your landscaper in you’re, making lots of money but you’re tired of people treat me like your return, so I started praying that I could become a source of wisdom, and so these are 57 specific moves that you can use to become a source of wisdom moves that I’ve used in the mindset number 10 on our series of 57 words of wisdom. You can find at 5 time should I come spike lee on the podcast. His you will fail to the level of preparation. The notion that you will rise to the occasion is false. Those who fail to prepare will lose to bill belichick the legendary coach of the new england patriots. He says my personal coaching philosophy. My mentality has always been to make things as difficult as possible for players in practice. However bad we can make them I make them. It’s knows. He always hope he always has the practices outside whenever it snows outside. Today. It’s raining, okay, we’ll practice outside enclosed facility, but he moves the practice to outside when the weather is bad in soap. At thrive we have 3 people right now that want to answer inbound phone calls and so right now they’re practicing, and they cannot make best business coach calls until I’ve heard their internal recorded calls in the recorded calls. They have practice dealing with the objections that people have or the commonly asked questions that rude people are rude, but only the customers make it externally. That’s why are people are so excellent? So I would ask you today. Are you preparing to succeed, state


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