Have you ever felt stuck in your career? Have you ever felt stuck in a relationship? Have you ever asked yourself, “Is this all that life has to offer?” Business Coaching Expert Clay explains the importance of designing your life and why if you don’t take the time to design your own life, no one else will do it for you.
NOTABLE QUOTABLE – “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” – Jim Rohn
Grabbed the duck tape and mentally prepare yourself for yet another mind expanding knowledge bomb from America’s number one business coaching expert, Clay Clark.
All right, thrive nation. On today’s edition of the knowledge bomb, we are teaching a simple concept that is powerful and life changing if put into practice, it is the underlying belief you must believe that you do have the ability to design every day and to design the life that you love. If you don’t like your life, you have the capacity to change it. In fact, Jim Roan, the best selling author once wrote. If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what, they have planned for you. Not much. So Chuck, I want to get your take on this. You’ve worked with Luke Owens for about a year, year and a half. Um, as a business coaching expert. And I would argue a friend and you guys have been a really good team together. How has luke, um, how have you been able to see luke change and transform? Because he’s really made a lot of positive improvements. His business is doing great. Kinda Brag on him a lot.
Yeah. Well one thing about Luke, if you’ve ever met him, you know that he is a big dude with a big heart and he really does want to help people and change people’s lives and be a positive influence and one thing that I think he’s realized is that it kind of relates to one of Dr Owners business coaching pig rules and it’s the big pig at the trough. Eats first and you’ve got to understand that when it’s your life that you’re talking about, you are the big pig and you’ve got to make sure and treat yourself right first before you put everybody in front of you. And for Luke, just really saying no to a lot of things besides the stuff on his goal list I think has helped him out a lot.
Now look, I want to get your take on this. Are People out there who are stuck and they feel like I do not like my life. Can you relate to that and maybe where are you at now versus where you used to be?
Sure I, I absolutely can relate to that. And the biggest shift that I’ve noticed for myself is that I stopped putting everybody else’s needs first, right? And reaction and all of this, right? So, uh, I started scheduling things like I mentioned earlier, um, and just got very intentional with my time and made that okay saying no. Yeah. And you know, actually one friend of mine said, you’re the yes man, you know, you love to help people and you’re always yes, yes, yes. And then you find yourself spread thin. So I’ve started saying no and got intentional with my time. Um, you know, and just lost the concern of pleasing everybody else.
And let me make sure that the listeners understand this. In a very real example, on the fourth of July, every year they shoot off fireworks right behind our building at the river. It’s a big firework display. And I’ve been there now for three years, going on four at that office. And every year I get asked, hey, do you want to watch the fireworks with me or my team? Or if you guys want to gather. And every year I say no. Now there are thousands of people that love watching fireworks and they actually will set up lawn chairs behind our building, which I have no problem with, and they’ll watch the fireworks, right? Just because I don’t want to watch the fireworks. It doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t like the fireworks or that you’re wrong if you do like them or they used to get mad at you for not wanting to write, but the issue is when somebody said, this happened here that I said, dude, the gathering place, they’re opening up.
You should go watch the roots live. You like the roots. And I said, I do. I love the Ritz. I said, well, you should go watch them. And I said, no, no, I only like to watch the roots on Youtube from a house and the camera angles or wave because I don’t ever want to be at a concert. You know, I’m not a concert guide. And they really like, yeah, like, no dude, dude, you’d love it and here’s where it starts. I go, no, no, no, no, I wouldn’t think. No, no, no. You wouldn’t know. Now I know what this is. I went to a concert with, with Colton and I actually enjoyed that cause I was there to try to break down the performance for a business reason, but I do not, I do not. I just do not enjoy concerts.
Yes. And I was in that position too, right where I’m doing things that did not, that I didn’t value and that didn’t propel my life forward. Right. And you only have so much time and uh, just just felt overly extended, unhappy. And now you asked what, what is the difference? Um, I look at what my needs and desires are first, put those into priority and then everything else comes after.
Right. But the thing is somebody would not let it go. They seriously would not stop asking me to go to the event. I let them know I don’t want to go. Trust me. I’m not going. What do you think it is about people, US humans in general that I see like that same team is um, right. Like, I’m going, it’s going to be great. Why don’t you want to go? I have an iphone. You have a Samsung, for example, for birthdays. I don’t like birthdays unless I plan my own birthday. Right when I planted my own birthday, which I’ve done several times. It’s awesome. Wake up at three working. Can you teach me how to do,
do that minds Tuesday? I want it to be awesome.
Oh, okay. Okay. I’m just years ago. What do you want to do? This is an example for my birthday. A few years ago I went, uh, I started the dialog about two weeks before my birthday. I told Vanessa, I said, this year it’s gonna, be a blowout. Huge. And she said, what are you doing? I said, I’ve bought myself the most expensive gifts, only the most finest purchases will do. I bought myself some of them. Anything that I’ve ever wanted, I have bought it. Even things I kind of, I don’t know if I want it, wouldn’t be prudent. I all of it. And I’ve wrapped them all. So we go out to this Irish restaurant, which is now at a business, but it was across from the Woodland Hills Mall with the red phone booth in front. I remember that. And open up the trunk of My car and I’ve got tons of gifts, like 20 gifts probably.
And I sit down, I’m like, well, which gives shoken up first. I wonder who this one’s from? And I said, I’d say, well why don’t you open up the gifts? Why don’t you. Because I, I it, it would be, it wouldn’t be humble for me to buy my own gifts. And then to open them up. I think I want to be. Let’s, let’s, let’s have a surprise so somebody can be surprised about the things about myself. Yeah. So Vanessa opens up gift number one and it’s definitely a gift for her. And then gift number two. And it’s for her three, four, five. Let me get to this massive box. And the box is like, is big. It’s like a, a large, uh, DJ speaker. It’s like a crate size, like a milk crate. It’s big. She opens it up and in that box was another box and the box smartbox box.
And that box is airbox. Smaller box more. So she’s just working away, getting away through it. And then that’s when I bought her a ring that costs more than my condo and then I said happy birthday to me that have a great night. And that was fun. That was fun. Then I did another party where I wait a minute, my goal to get 300 people there. So I just wanna get 300 people. I don’t even care if I like him or not. I want the Mojo. I did that in high school and I fell short of the goal. I think I got like 200 people there. It’s a big party. But I invited everybody and we played a shirts on skins outdoor three on three basketball in the winter because I’m November, it was like 20 degrees. We put shirts on skins, we had an outdoor basketball tournament.
My driveway had music pumped up, I had to hold the DJ equipment and we played. And then we did bill your tournaments and it was super fun. It was high energy and we played for money. So each guy to play in the tournament had to put in 10 bucks in the team, won a bunch of money. I loved it. It was like competitive and playing basketball. I’m getting into arguments with people on my birthday, shoving people trash, talking on my birthday, listening to loud music. They loved it because I designed it. What I wanted. We were serving. I think I had tripped at the time, like spicy shrimp. Just the whole thing was how I wanted it. Shrimp now I can tell you the birthdays that I’ve always hated as a kid or as an adult are the ones that other people planned for me.
I don’t like birthday parties if someone else plans it because I know what I like. Thanks for the underwear. You know what I mean though, I, I’m just, I get and I feel bad for people and I just don’t want you to play on my birthday for me. So mad. I want to ask you this though. Um, you, I feel like in the happiness project and that is the life I feel like getting happier. Oh yeah. As accurate or am I wrong there? Oh yeah, absolutely. It happiness from where I was. Even. How has working here impacted your happiness level? The habits that I have been developing after working at thrive has skyrocketed. I mean I was always already moving upward, young happiness, but the habits that you have been teaching and that other people would thrive have been like kind of, hey, you should be doing this night and day.
What are some specific habits that you’ve picked up that maybe have helped you? I got rid of my smartphone. There we go. And I went back to a flip phone and just not having that constant connectivity. I sleep better at night. Um, and by the way, psychology today would show you statistics and data that proves that not having a smartphone near your head when you’re sleeping will help you. It’s not just mass opinion continuum at. Yeah. And a stress. Oh my goodness. Not having the smartphone. I can leave my phone at home. I’m like, Oh yeah, I don’t have my phone on me. Oh well. But if I had done that with an iphone, I’m like, oh, I gotta go back out of travel 20 minutes just to get it. Because it was always at pool. It was like duct taped to my side and that right there changed the game for me.
What else has changed in the game? Uh, I’m actually working out. Before I started working at thrive, I was trying to, you know, a little bit here, a little bit there, kind of started eating healthier. But uh, I started working out at the hub gym twice a week with a trainer. I’ve been improving on my eating habits. I still need to work on that, but I am improving, uh, in just the level of energy that have the mental clarity a half. I’m actually doing stuff that moves my body on a regular basis. You’re looking good. What’s interesting for the listeners out there is that you have the capacity to change. I believe in you. I know that you do have the capacity to change. You are not a dog. You’re not a monkey. Therefore you’re not a cat. You have the ability to change. You can change.
And a lot of people think that they don’t have the ability to change. I’m telling you, you are. You were created by God. You might not agree with me on that part, but I believe you were created by God a who has infinite intelligence and who designed everything about you, but for whatever reason he gave you choices. I wish he would not have given me choices personally. I wish we lived in a world of robotics where I was forced to do whatever I had to do, but he gave us freewill and because he did you have the decision to do drugs or not to work out or not to sleep in or not to get your work done or not to write that book you’ve been talking about or not. You can be intentional or you can just drift through life and if you are intentional and you’re intentionally building a commercial building, I would encourage you to use a company that will help you get the project done on time and on budget that companies will dash conduct come. That’s will dash conduct comments. Williams contracting. Checking out today will dash conduct come and now without any further ado, three, two, one, boom.